


They Call Me Useless, They Call You a Villain

by momokolove



Category: Heathers: The Musical - Murphy & O'Keefe, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Heathers Fusion, Anxious Midoriya Izuku, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Based on Heathers, Bullying, Consensual Underage Sex, Doesn't mean they won't suffer, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, I'm physically incapable of writing sad endings, M/M, Midoriya Izuku Does Not Have One for All Quirk, Midoriya Izuku is in General Studies, Most Characters are Seventeen Years Old, Murder, Out of Character Characters (I had to make some characters really mean), Protective Shinsou Hitoshi, Quirkless Midoriya Izuku, Recreational Drug Use, School Hierarchy, Suicide Attempt, Third Year U.A., This will diverge from the Heathers plot a bit too, Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-08-06
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:53:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 21,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24388483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/momokolove/pseuds/momokolove
Summary: ( Disclaimer: You do not need to know Heathers to enjoy this story ! )"	... This world isn't very easy for people like Midoriya.It's been this way for a long time: Since before quirks even existed.You most likely know the story... Anyone who's different needs to find their own way to survive.It's ironic, really; The fact that in a world where everyone is celebrated for having quirks which make them all wildly unique, being different is still a problem. "Or:	In this universe, the school hierarchy is much more aggressive.You either bend and snap, or do what you can to survive.Midoriya is willing to scrape by however he can to get through his final year at U.A.; Shinsou wants to take a more aggressive route, and change the world.
Relationships: Ashido Mina & Bakugou Katsuki & Kaminari Denki, Kirishima Eijirou & Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu, Midoriya Izuku & Uraraka Ochako, Midoriya Izuku/Shinsou Hitoshi
Comments: 79
Kudos: 127
Collections: モモコ's hitoshi and izuku story library





	1. Quirkless

_"Quirk Analysis No.26"_

A permanent black marker scrawled the characters on the cover of a fresh notebook, the tip of the pen going back and underlining the _"No.26"_ a few times in order to make sure that number was carefully read when looked for amongst the other twenty-five quirk analysis journals.

The cover was then flipped open to the first page, the stem of the book being pushed down on further so the newness of it didn't allow for the notebook to just close in on itself before anything could be written.

Although quietly, words began to slowly spill out of the mouth of the person holding said journal as he recalled the new Pro Hero he had seen on the news before school early this morning:

_The Paper Hero, Orizuru_

_Quirk: Paper Life_

_Gives life to paper objects_

_Can make paper objects move on command as well as on its own accord._

_Does the paper become sentient? If so, to what extent (can the paper make its own decisions, can it feel any emotions)? Judging by what was shown on TV, the paper most likely remains "alive" as long as Orizuru allows it to or the paper becomes too damaged- It's also plausible that if Orizuru becomes fatigued or hurt himself, the effect on the paper objects also wears off...-_

"Watch it, freak!"

Midoriya lets out a small yelp as he finds himself falling back on the ground, having accidentally run into the back of someone in front of him as he was lost in thought.

"It's the quirkless kid... I'm surprised he made it to his third year, even if he _is_ just in General Studies," someone beside that person he had accidentally bumped into huffed.

"Apparently he's freakishly smart though- He's always analysing everyone and finding out everything he can about people's quirks and shit," added in another student with their group.

"Ugh, that's creepy... Let's keep walking, I don't want him to start gathering info on _me_..."

The so-called "quirkless kid" sat there on the ground for a second, somewhat bewildered by the current interaction he just had. No, it's of course not the first time he's had such an interaction. He's never gone a week of his life without having something uncomfortable happen to him- Often, he can barely make it through a day.

_Midoriya Izuku_

_Quirk: None_

_Painfully reminded by the fact every day of his life_

Letting out a shaky sigh, he pulled himself to his feet once more, dusting off his behind and continuing to walk to class; Much less in his own head compared to before, but continuing to brainstorm the limitations, strengths and weaknesses of The Paper Hero's quirk.

This world isn't very easy for people like Midoriya.

It's been this way for a long time: Since before quirks even existed.

You most likely know the story... Anyone who's different needs to find their own way to survive.

It's ironic, really; The fact that in a world where everyone is celebrated for having quirks which make them all wildly unique, being different is still a problem.

During class itself, Midoriya didn't pay attention too much, already being well-informed on the material. Today was the first day of the new school year – his third school year – as well as full of relaxed lessons where they go over what they learned the previous semester before moving on to the next subject they'll be learning about.

Midoriya wouldn't be lying either if he were to say that he was surprised to have made it this far, either. To his third year- Hell, to being seventeen years old.

He wasn't sure exactly what he was expecting to happen to him otherwise;

Caught up in a villain attack, rendered _useless_ without a quirk-

Finally pushed to the edge by people telling him to take swan dives off the roof.

His mother's smothering parenting tactics finally suffocating him.

... Anyways, even if they weren't reviewing school material they've already done, Midoriya studied a little further during the spring break seeing as he didn't have much better to do.

It wasn't long before lunchtime arrived, students flooding the halls to get some food in themselves as well as having time to talk and hang out with friends for a bit.

Midoriya stood back a second, hoping to first enter the hallway once the current of students weakened, but found himself pulled in with the rest of the crowd anyways. It really isn't that full, but he doesn't like being so _close_ to the loud, faceless people.

He breathed a sigh of relief upon being in the significantly more open space of the lunchroom; However, that relief was short lived, as he knew what typically ensues during lunch- On the first day of school, no less.

You'd be surprised how little a top hero school can differentiate from an average highschool in the city.

"H-hey, say sorry..!!" Midoriya looked over as another General Studies student – a small girl with large, black-rimmed glasses, most likely in her first year – stood before a third year Hero Course student, someone Midoriya immediately recognized as Tetsutetsu.

_Oh no._

The larger third-year peered down at her with his steely gaze, almost in disbelief at the fact that she'd speak to him in general before an awful smirk grew on his face and he scoffed.

"Eh? You must be a first year then, huh?" Leaning in, the smaller girl took a step back, visibly shaking. Her knuckles were white as they clutched a book she was holding out slightly in front of her chest, as if it would help protect her from the threat looming above her.

Then, he started laughing. He slapped her book to the side before pushing her backwards, the girl easily losing her footing and landing on the ground – not to hurt her, or rough her up – but to assert dominance.

"I don't know what you were expecting, enrolling in the top hero school in the country. You better learn quickly that there's a social standing in any school you go to though, and you're at the bottom of that fuckin' stand. Me? I'm the top of the food chain." Tetsutetsu flashed his sharp teeth.

"Don't think you can stand up to me again like that."

_Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu_

_Quirk: Steel_

_Allows him to turn his skin into steel_

Tetsutetsu walked away, pushing past Midoriya with that shit-eating grin, causing him to stumble back a bit as well.

The only people really watching the situation were other first year students, many thankful they weren't the sacrifice to learn how this school is no exception to any normal school.

In many ways, it's worse.

Hero Course students typically stood at the top; Those blessed with flashier, harder-hitting quirks. Business and Support classes did their best to not stand out, but still became targets easily enough.

General Studies students... usually got the brunt of it.

And don't even get me started on quirk type discrimination;

_In my case, lack thereof._

Midoriya physically jumped, slightly squeaking as he felt a four-finger touch to his shoulder, turning around to look at the source before his whole body visibly relaxed.

_Uraraka Ochaco_

_Quirk: Zero Gravity_

_Can make people and things weightless with the pads on the tips of her fingers_

"Ahh, sorry Izuku..!!" Uraraka took a step back, waving her hands in the air before settling on a small grin as she saw the smile spreading across Midoriya's face.

Midoriya truly valued those warm brown eyes, always inviting and full of energy.

He shook his head, his smile widening further. "No worries..! I just wasn't expecting to see you."

"Well of course I ran straight to find you! You barely talked with me during the break- Ah! Wait, hey, I actually wanted to know if you wanted to watch _Kiki's Delivery Service_ after school with me!"

Midoriya couldn't help but giggle at that: "Again? You really love those pre-quirk era animations."

Uraraka puffed out her cheeks, her fists clenched in the type of way you do when you get passionate about a topic: "I can't help it, they're just soo good! I'm a sucker for how pure and whimsical everything is in them."

Ever since the start of the first year, Midoriya and Uraraka have been close friends, finding comfort in each other's company in an otherwise difficult environment. Although Uraraka had made it into the Hero Course, she doesn't get along the best with her classmates, to put it lightly...-

"Uraraka Āpā-co!" 

Uraraka gasped, reeling forwards as someone pushed harshly into her back, Midoriya barely being able to catch her.

“Aw, did you miss me?” The classmate laughed, Midoriya looking down at his friend's face to see it heat up with embarrassment, causing him to grit his teeth and glare at the reason for it.

_Kirishima Eijiro_

_Quirk: Hardening_

_Can harden his whole body, which can be used for offense or defense_

In a brief flash of confidence fueled by anger, Midoriya stood Uraraka upright and took a brave step towards Kirishima, his eyes narrowed, the emerald depths of his irises looking as if they had been set ablaze

“What do you think gives you the right to mess with whoever you want? Aren't you supposed to be a hero? Is this what heroes do? Why even bother going to a hero school, applying to the Hero Course- Heroes are supposed to help people, t-to save people, to make people feel safe, and yet you just use that power to make people feel awful instead, y-you use that power to make people feel insignificant because y-you're the one who gets s-special training for your quirk a-and fighting a-a-and...-”

Kirishima stared blankly at Midoriya for a few moments; But those few moments felt like eternity for the smaller third year General Studies student who just realized he went off on a tangent and stood up against someone who was indeed at the top of the food chain, while he was but a quirkless small-fry.

A regular punch to the gut, not even reinforced with his quirk had him double over.

“And you're quirkless.”

The red-head _spat_ those words as his eyes pierced through his soul, as he stared down at him- _looking down on him-_

That was all he needed to say as he turned around and walked away, joining up with Tetsutetsu.

The stinging mark left from his punch was just another, unforgettable reminder of the fact that he's useless quirkless.

Midoriya's legs gave in as he collapsed, feeling as if he just fought in a full-on war, wiping cold-sweat from his forehead. Uraraka was there beside him, whatever she was saying not really registering as words in his head, his heart pounding in his ears.

In his current state, he could almost hear the aching hearts of others around him, caught in this fucked up system.

_“Why do they hate me?”_

_“Why don't I fight back?”_

_“Why do I act like such a jerk?”_

_“Somebody hug me.”_

_“Somebody fix me.”_

_“Somebody save me.”_

_“Give me something to live for.”_

_…_ There's one slight exception.

The three.

Those three.

They aren't even at the top of the food chain.

They hold it in the palms of their hands.

_Kaminari Denki_

_Quirk: Electrification_

_Can discharge electricity and use it to attack or find enemies_

Potentially the most relaxed of the three; He has his own air to him... that could just have something to do with his quirk though.

_Ashido Mina_

_Quirk: Acid_

_Can secrete acid from her body and use it to attack or move_

She never stops talking, and _god_ does she love to gossip.

_Bakugou Katsuki_

_Quirk: Explosion_

_Uses a nitroglycerin-like substance secreted on the palms of his hands to create explosions_

The Almighty.

  
  


_He's the biggest fucking bitch._

  
  
  
  


They're never bothered- Never harassed. They're an odd crew, you wouldn't think they fit together, yet it's uncommon to not see them around each other.

_I would give anything to just be left alone like that._

Although, that's a little difficult when one of them is your childhood tormentor.

__________

“Hey, hey..! Did you hear? The quirkless kid had it in him to snap at Kirishima yesterday at lunch before he collapsed into a pathetic mess hehehe~” Ashido giggled, her fluffy hair which rivaled Midoriya's bouncing up and down with her easily-excited movements, recalling what she had heard through others from the beginning of lunch the previous day when the group was still absent.

“ _Shitty fucking Deku..._ ” Bakugou hissed, his eyes glaring as they focused on an image in his head, hands tensed in front of him as he set off mini explosions in the air, envisioning having the pleasure of said Deku in the empty space between his fingers instead.

Kaminari hummed in thought, his golden gaze unfocused, looking up to the side, his arms behind his head as he walked. “Y'know, I bet he'd be willing to do anything for us though.”

Ashido did a slight double-take as he spoke before laughing. “I think most people in this school would be willing to do, like, almost anything for us, idiot.”

“No no, listen- I think most people at least have a little bit of self-dignity left, right? But I can't imagine the quirkless kid having anything to lose being our personal dog if he got left alone for it.”

The pink-skinned girl had an exaggerated curious expression, her hand stroking her chin thoughtfully.

Ah. Speak of the devil.

Midoriya was just rounding the corner, his eyes glued to that _“shitty” (as Bakugou would describe it)_ notebook of his.

Bakugou sped up his pace- His heavy footsteps and the crackling of the explosions in his right hand immediately alerting the General Studies student, the smaller boy's eyes flying wide open as he stared at the oncoming Hero Course student, struck with fear.

Midoriya let out a slight whine as he was pushed and held up against the wall by his collar, squirming.

“Katsuki, don't kill him..!!” Ashido huffed, catching up with him. “I think Denki might actually have a point. It could be fun..!”

Instead of meeting Bakugou's gaze, he caught Ashido's, finding himself suddenly having more to fear than just Bakugou with the scary grin she was wearing. He could almost feel himself being sucked into that stare; Her black sclera appearing as cold, depthless voids.

Kaminari caught up as well, stretching, perhaps slightly more alert than he had been previously. “Yeah, I doubt you even have to scare him into doing it.”

_… Do what??_

Midoriya began to panic more, really not liking whatever they were scheming, and how they're talking about him as if he isn't even there, _as if he isn't worth even being talked to directly-_

The hot-headed individual glanced at each of the other two before his fiery gaze fell back onto the one he's got pinned. He reinforced his grip.

“The most useful thing he could do for me is just fucking die already, but if you have any better ideas I'll fuckin' take them.” Midoriya's breath caught at the words coming from the other's mouth, dripping like venom onto him.

Ashido put her fingers together thoughtfully. “Hmm... We could test it with something small first! How about he gets us soda?”

“Oh, we could have him run to the gas station at the bottom of the hill and get us some meat buns! I'm really in the mood for that-” Kaminari added in.

Midoriya gulped as he was pressed against the wall harder before the hold on him slowly loosened and he's fallen to the ground.

“.. _Tch, fine._ Shitty Deku, get a move on. I want a melon soda.”

“I want strawberry soda!!”

“Surprise me- Just don't forget my meat bun.”

“... d-d-does everyo-one want a-a meat b-bun or-”

“I can't fucking hear you, don't make me have to fucking repeat myself or I won't take any more suggestions from these two.”

Midoriya shot up, albeit shakily before sprinting off to complete his new task, not being able to bring himself to worry about the fact that he definitely won't be making it to class before the bell rings.

His heart pounded in his ears, the convenience store attendant looking at him a bit funny as students never really come here until around five to ten minutes after school gets out.

The short, shaky teenager with his mop of messy green hair managed to mutter out a small thanks before dashing back off again, hoping he's been fast enough as to not receive anymore burn scars.

By the time he got back, the three were no longer there where he had met them, causing him to freak out further as he began to search around for them.

It took about five minutes, Midoriya still shaky as he gave them what they had requested; He got everyone meat buns to stay on the safe side.

Ashido clapped, gazing at her friend with a large smile. “Kaminari! You're a genius! We have a personal dog now, I've always wanted to have a dog you know? My parents never let me get one when I was younger because I couldn't control my acid properly though!” She laughed, as if she hadn't just suggested a morbid outcome for anyone bestowed with the honor of being her pet.

Although Midoriya was confused (and mildly terrified), he didn't dare speak without being given permission; That didn't change his puzzled expression though.

Ashido noticed, looking back at him. “Hey hey, Deku, right? That's a cute name for a dog hehe. Hey, your hair is like a fluffy dog!” The acid girl reached out and patted the top of his head, Midoriya just partially frozen in shock of whatever was happening.

“Katsukiiiiii, can we keep him please? I'll make sure he doesn't get in your way, pleaaaase?”

The brute in question had already finished his meat bun, now aggressively downing his soda, wiping his mouth as he finished. Bakugou opened his mouth, about to respond to Ashido, most likely going to negate her request when-

“What are you four doing outside of class?”

Everyone snapped their necks to look over at the person who spoke the words, Midoriya gulping as he began to shake a bit again. _Oh god I can't miss a class on the second day I- I have to- I need an excuse I-_

To the other three's surprise, Midoriya turned around fully to meet Midnight, cold-sweat forming on the back of his neck and forehead once more, trying to wipe his clammy palms on his pants.

“I-I um, I-I got permission f-from my t-teacher to a-ask t-them u-um, about technicalities with t-their quirks, and u-uh... H-help analyze other w-ways they can improve their training w-without relying on t-their Hero Costumes a-and Support Items, a-and find out more a-about their Quirk Family Tree a-and-” Bakugou's shoe pressed down harshly on the back of Midoriya's heel, the other wincing in pain as he was reminded to shut up at a certain point.

Midnight stared for a second before letting out a hearty laughing, throwing her head back. “Yes, no need to get so nervous around me Midoriya, I trust you. Carry on you four... have fun~” She grinned before walking away, the way she said the last part making Midoriya feel... uncomfortable.

As she left, the green-haired boy almost felt he had a moment to let the tension leave his body when the stares of the people on the back of his head behind him burnt into his skull, reminding him once more of the situation he's really in.

Slowly, not really sure if he actually wants to do so or not, he turns to meet those gazes; Only to be met with the grins of Ashido and Kaminari, as well as the rather bitter/pissed off look which always manages to find itself on the face of Bakugou.

“Cmon, Katsu’...” Kaminari says this time. “I think he'll be useful for a lot of things, actually.”

Bakugou makes another _tch_ sound, crossing his arms and turning his head to the side.

“If it ever finds itself in front of me, I won't hesitate to cremate your _puppy_.”

He looks at Midoriya this time as he says the last part: he knows he's serious.

Ashido and Kaminari both leap up in victory, patting Midoriya's head together and making sounds dogs would usually respond to.

_God, what have I gotten myself into..._

____________

Uraraka filed into the lunch room at around the same time as everyone else did.

Usually, Midoriya was either one of the first ones there or one of the last ones- He tends to do what works best to avoid the crowds.

Seeing as Uraraka was here before her friend, she assumed he'd be there within the next few minutes, already beginning to eat some of Lunch Rush's food.

She... didn't really like to be alone at school. Specifically in the lunch room. There were never any teachers _really_ watching, and people got to get carried away with certain things more often.

She could really hear and see the things which were happening around her more.

_“Out of my way, fuckin' loser!”_

_“I don't want trouble-”_

_“You're gonna die at 4pm.”_

_“Don't even think about touching me! Get away, pervert!”_

_“What did I ever do to them?”_

_“Who could survive this-”_

_“I can't escape this- “_

_“I think I'm dying-”_

“Wait, who's that with Bakugou?”

“What?”

Uraraka looked up, puzzled, many other people following in her suit at the confused words of others pointing out something... different.

No one ever... just walked into the lunchroom with Bakugou and the other two.

Then, her eyes went wide as they rested on the familiar, wild, dark green hairstyle of her close friend.

“...Izuku?”

“Midoriya Izuku?”

“The quirkless kid?”

“I must be seeing things-”

Midoriya's skin grew uncomfortably hot underneath the stares of everyone else around him. He could hear his name being muttered – more often than not, _“the quirkless kid”_ was what the others referred to him as – each time giving the back of his neck a prickly sensation.

He really had no clue what he was getting himself into.

If it was worth the potential absence of him being a target for the last of his final year in U.A.

As his gaze got brave enough to wander from somewhere that isn't the floor, his eyes locked with his closest friend, a mix of emotions on her face as she watched from this other side of the room.

A small, nervous wave was all he could muster.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ( Small note: Āpā means stupid/dummy)
> 
> So !!  
> This is my first time ever writing... anything really?  
> My first time ever taking the time to write a proper story, that is.  
> For many years I've loved making characters and roleplaying and such, but I've always been terrified of the idea of using other people's characters and trying to mold a story with them.
> 
> However; Not long ago, I read my first ever My Hero Academia story (fanfiction) and fell in love with the character dynamic of Shinsou and Midoriya..!!  
> I really want to try to explore the limitless possibilities of their relationships in different alternate realities, and since I've always wanted to write something with a similar plot to Heathers, I thought this should be my first work!
> 
> I had a few different people read through the first chapter for me, and I thought I should mention this quickly here:  
> In this alternate universe, the school systems are a lot more aggressive and judgmental, which have molded many different characters we've come to know and love into different people. Such as for Kirishima- When he was younger, he was pushed around a lot more. It took until he got into the Hero Course at U.A. for him to realize he didn't want to be weak anymore, and he had that opportunity now to be at the top at least. Over the three years he has been at the top, that's continued to change him as well, making him less and less empathetic.  
> I know, I love him too, but bare with me, I'm just writing a story here...
> 
> Anyways, I'm not sure how many people will enjoy this, and whether or not the lack of response to the work will demotivate me... But I want to do my best to give it all nevertheless!  
> That being said, I'd certainly appreciate any form of feedback I can get as well.
> 
> By the way!  
> The Paper Hero mentioned at the beginning of the chapter is a character of mine named Tadaharu!  
> [Here's an image of him if you're interested!](https://twitter.com/momokolove_/status/1264963936312594432)


	2. No Choice

_The Fragile Hero: Fragment_

_Quirk: Stained Glass_

_Can materialize forms of brittle, stained glass_

Midoriya muttered to himself as he scribbled in his quirk analysis journal, currently waiting on the other three of the group he's now been in for the past three weeks.

_Three weeks, huh?_

His muttering and writing ceased as his mind began to wander elsewhere.

There's also a reason he didn't think _his group_.

Even though he's almost always with the group now outside of lessons and not including the days their Hero Course has other things to do, it's still hard to consider himself properly a part of the group.

He's definitely not their equal; _And although_ ~~_Ashido and Kaminari_ ~~ _Mina and Denki are constantly treating me like a puppy in a sickly sweet way, there's an indisputable imbalance of power._

“ _Oh, Deku~! You know, you should call us by our given names! It's cuter hehe, I feel like if my puppy could speak they would whine using them.”_

Midoriya bit his lip at recalling the words. Everyone was calling him Deku now as well. The rest of the school caught on to the nickname, and now it was impossible to escape.

He... He wasn't sure what to feel.

_I guess it's better than being punched and directly being called useless._

“Yo, Deku!”

The General Studies student snapped out of his thoughts as he looked up, met by his yellow haired... co-worker?

Maybe that'd be a better way to describe the relationship... No, wait-

Boss.

His yellow-haired boss.

Midoriya shut his journal closed, beginning to fidget a bit as the other two trailed behind.

“H-hi Denki...”

Mina could be heard snickering behind the one he just greeted, throwing an arm around her friend's neck.

“Me! Say my name too, puppy!”

He grit back the impulse to roll his eyes or click his tongue.

“Hi, M-mina...”

The female's laughter rang out, high-pitch and laced with a type of toxicity that furthered to put Midoriya in his place.

“Start moving, I'm hungry,” Bakugou growled, stalking ahead.

Ashido and Kaminari exchanged a look before following close after him, the green-haired boy making sure he didn't fall behind as well.

When it came to Bakugou.. he wasn't sure what to call him, and just avoided talking to him as much as possible in general.

Back when they were kids, he'd always call his childhood friend _Kaachan,_ but...

It's hard to refer to someone as such a cutesy nickname while they're searing your skin, staring at you while smiling with those _red, red eyes-_

He took a second to draw in and let out a shaky breath. They had arrived at the cafeteria, and Midoriya went about his typical task of getting them all their lunches.

The shorter boy is able to manage three trays, even if he moves pretty slow in order to be extra cautious. Thankfully, no one ever goes out of their way to bother him anymore, so no one tries to trip him or bumps into him as he walks.

Midoriya gives the three their lunches before going off and standing in line all over again to get his own. Some days, they send him to get things from the convenience store at the bottom of the hill; He's thankful that they've started to give him money to do so as well, Kaminari having said that the money he pays with is probably his mom's, and he isn't the type to rob an old lady like that (ignoring the fact he called his mom an old lady).

As he got his lunch, he went over to Uraraka, something he wishes he got to do more often but hasn't had the time as much recently.

“Oh... Hi Izuku.” She managed a weak smile, something which tore at her friend's heart.

“Ochaco- I'm so sorry I haven't been around as much recently, I- I've been stressed, I've been doing my best not to get on the Bakugou Gang's bad side, and-”

The brown haired girl was quick to shake her head, although a twinge of sadness persisted in her eyes.

“No..! Don't worry, please. I'm just really glad that you haven't been pushed around recently, that's all I could want for my friend. As long as... we're still friends. That's all that matters to me.”

Midoriya was the one quick to move his head this time, doing so up and down.

“Of course. You're... the only friend I've ever really had.”

Uraraka smiled. It was soft, still laced with a type of somberness, but it was enough to have Midoriya returning the same type of one.

It was a nice lunch. It wasn't much unlike the ones they had always shared before, but it felt... so much more precious. He didn't know how many more of these lunches he was going to have left, and suddenly he was truly cherishing all the ones he's had up until now as well.

Showing his best friend all the notes on quirks he's taken, ranting about the latest hero debuts; Then Uraraka gushing about the shows and movies she's been watching, Midoriya knowing they were 'Ochaco Certified', AKA 'Safe To Watch' (they all have happy endings).

Among their chattering they always try to cram in as much food as they can when they have a break from their own speeches. Typically when the bell rings, they end up needing to both just choke down the rest before they have to head to class.

Midoriya said bye to Uraraka. She had a brightness in her eyes that was missing when he first approached her at lunch today; He was sure that she had a similar effect on him.

He entered his classroom, finding as he sat down his cheeks somewhat hurt from smiling.

__________

It's been a month now.

Midoriya hadn't had another chance to sit down with Uraraka since that one time a week ago; The Bakusquad having increased their requests.

These ranged from things like doing their homework, helping Ashido spread the word on a party that was gonna be in two weeks, and sitting still on a bench outside during lunch while the toxic queen insists on making him look cuter, because he really doesn't have the worst face out there (her words exactly).

It was... an interesting feeling, wearing a bit of concealer under his eyes, as well as some mascara and lip gloss; Kaminari had been there was well, his gaze glued to his phone for the most part, but adding in that she should push his hair out of his face a bit more.

Midoriya did not fully appreciate the suggestion: Having his bangs in his face as well as the curly bits poking in from the sides was comforting, as he felt it was easier to hide with them.

However, when Ashido held up a mirror to his face...

Honestly? It was a bit of a welcomed change.

It wasn't really noticeable he was wearing any makeup; And Kaminari was right, pushing some of the hair out of his face really opened it up more, believe it or not.

Gingerly, he took the mirror, inspecting himself in it, running a finger along his cheeks. He already has relatively soft skin, but it felt so _soft_...

Midoriya looked up at his boss.

… his co-worker?

There was something about having someone do your makeup that made it hard for you to feel like you're just a slave- Almost a form of bonding experience. He couldn't understand why exactly she would do this either; He's just supposed to be the puppy that fetches their requests and let's the others play with him, and yet...

He must have been muttering. Ashido rolled her eyes, grin finding its way on her face once more.

“As cute as a dirty little puppy with a moppy mess of hair is, it can become an eyesore real quick. Besides, Denki never lets me use him as a doll to test my makeup on.” She threw in a slight pout, glancing at the other.

“Here, take these. I got new ones anyways. You better come in looking cute from now on, you here?”

The Hero Course student shoved the few things she had used into Midoriya's arms, the receiver making puzzled noises as he tried to make sure it didn't all fall. She huffed before turning around, walking away, leaving him confused with a handful of makeup products.

Slowly and hesitantly, he turned to look at Kaminari, him noticing and shrugging. “She doesn't like getting attached to shit.”

As abruptly as she had left, she was soon running back towards them, Bakugou ensue.

“Oi, _Deku_ , I got a job for you.”

Upon the demand, he quickly set down the things he had been given and stood up straight.

“Y-yes?”

Bakugou stared at him for a second before scoffing. “Airhead-bitch has been pissing me off recently. Write a letter sayin' it's from Kirishima Eijiro, sayin' how much he likes her n' shit, and that she's invited to the party comin' up.”

Midoriya's face morphs from a brief moment of confusion to horror, followed by anger.

“W-what do you mean she's been pissing you off?! She didn't do anything-”

Bakugou narrowed his eyes. “Don't fucking mess with me. Do what I say.”

Kaminari was off his phone now, getting up off the bench and taking some steps back from the two. Ashido took a step back herself. They were smart enough not to get caught in any crossfire.

“... N-no.”

“... What?”

“I- I said no. I don't- I don't care about doing all the things you say usually, it's fine, b-but, I'm not going to do something that will hurt my f-friend.”

His childhood tormentor just stood there for a second, dumbfounded.

  
  
  


Then, something snapped.

Midoriya let out a slight cry of pain as Bakugou's hand had found itself around his neck, heating up but not quite exploding.

He started laughing.

“I don't think you fucking understand what kind of a situation you're in, _you fucking bitch._ You know I can make every day a living hell for you. You fucking know I can have everyone in this school beating you down, worse than before- I'll fucking make sure you won't survive your last year of school, I'll fucking make sure your body will be littered with scars that will forever remind you of the time you thought it was fucking cute to stand up to me.”

Bakugou squeezed down tighter on his neck, leaving the other to make a choked whine. The shorter boy had tears pricking at the corner of his eyes now, _it hurt it hurt it hurt he was scared- he doesn't- he can't- he wants to_ live-

He was slammed back down into the bench before the burning hand was no longer hindering the oxygen to his head. Coughing, sputtering, his own hand hovering over the minor burn which hopefully wouldn’t scar.

Eyes.

Red, red eyes looked down on him.

The voice he hated most spoke.

“I hope I made myself fucking clear.”

Bakugou turned heel and left. Ashido's eyes lingered on Midoriya a moment longer before she tutted and left with him.

Kaminari stayed for a second.

… Then he left as well.

Midoriya wasn't sure how long ago the bell had rang.

When the pounding in his own ears had ceased and he could breathe somewhat normally again, he shakily got to his feet- almost falling.

His hands- _fuck, stop shaking, just-_

He did his best to shove his shit in his bag before heading to the bathroom.

God, he-

_I don’t look too great. I mean, I don’t feel too great either._

The mascara which Ashido had put on him was waterproof it seemed at least.

Midoriya let out a dry laugh.

He kept laughing, until he broke down into tears.

He thought...

God, what did he think?

_I thought I could escape all this shit. I thought sucking up to those three, to_ him _would save me from even just a bit of torment- I was so desperate to just not have it happen anymore I was so sick of it I- I didn't think this would end up affecting anyone else- God I'm so-_

Pathetic.

He ran a trembling hand through his hair.

Fuck, he forgot how much clothing hurt when brushed against a burn too.

Midoriya set his bag down on the bathroom counter, pulling out a paper and pen.

He had gotten pretty good with imitating the other three's handwritings at least. Since he didn't know Kirishima's, he'll just use a mixture of Bakugou's and Kaminari's and put a little twist on it- He's sure Uraraka doesn't know what his handwriting looks like anyways, right?

He paused- He's really doing it, huh? He's going to hurt his best friend. The only person who ever bothered talking to him and bothered being there for him and-

Shit, and now he's crying again.

Bakugou... Bakugou could really, _really_ hurt him though.

Midoriya doesn't feel safe going against his will.

It's too late.

  
  


His pen meets the paper after he rubbed tears from his eyes, beginning to write.

  
  


_Please... Please forgive me, Ochaco._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I got to writing the next chapter as soon as I did haha  
> When I uploaded the first one, I kept refreshing it all the time to see how many kudos I got, as well as hits and bookmarks- It made me really happy!  
> Although, I didn't realized how little people make bookmark notes
> 
> The hero mentioned at the beginning is another OC of mine !  
> [Here is a drawing of them !](https://twitter.com/momokolove_/status/1266354478288175104)
> 
> I really hope you enjoyed this chapter and continue to enjoy it- Leave a comment if you'd like, I really appreciate it..!!


	3. New Guy

She was ecstatic.

Midoriya could never understand what Uraraka saw in him.

Granted, he didn't know what Kirishima was like when he was little and they went to the same grade school.

But should that matter? He's definitely not a good person now; He makes her feel like shit. Even if... the letter was real. Midoriya would protect his best friend from a toxic relationship like that.

… Yet here he was.

He's the one who wrote the letter.

Now, Uraraka has her heart set on a figment of reality. She's always smiling whenever he catches a glimpse of her. She actually... started to try and start conversations with some other General Studies students. They were wary of her, since she was indeed a Hero Course student- Yet one of them actually sat with her at lunch the following day.

At least... something good came out of it.

_That's all I can tell myself for now._

Oh- The burn on his neck wasn't irritated anymore.

It had been two days since that incident, and Midoriya was just thankful that there wouldn't be a permanent mark leftover. Maybe a slight different in skin pigmentation, but it seemed to be healing fine.

Things seemed... back to normal with the Bakugou Squad, at least. He was more wary in comparison to a few days ago- Comfortable not being the right word, but he had started to relax a bit more in the company of the other three.

Ashido was upset when he didn't come into school yesterday with the makeup on, but he was just... so tired. The events of that afternoon the day before had really drained him. Kaminari was the one who retorted to Ashido that even if he had done that minimal makeup she had requested and pushed his hair back more, he'd still look like shit.

Strangely enough, Midoriya somewhat appreciated that, as Ashido begrudgingly resorted to complaining about other things instead.

Bakugou... was just Bakugou. It didn't even seem like he was more pissed off with the green-haired boy than usual.

He delivered his message the way he wanted to do it and knew it wouldn't be a problem in the future.

Today, he had managed to do what Ashido had instructed. It was a bit frustrating putting mascara on, but thankfully he hadn't completely poked out his eye.

He felt... more exposed with his hair pushed back some. So he didn't have to constantly readjust it, he got two small hair pins from his mom that got lost in his mess of curls anyways. Not being able to turn his head to the side so other people can't see his embarrassment or for when he generally just doesn't want people looking at him was really hard to work with.

It didn't help that today he really did feel more stares on him than usual... _It can't have anything to do with that subtle of a change, or?_

Maybe it was less subtle than he thought.

Going to stand in line waiting to get the other three's lunches, Midoriya noticed as he came to a standstill that Kaminari had actually joined him. Bakugou hissed, asking what the other was doing to which the electric quirk boy shrugged, his hands behind his head in a relaxed pose.

“I don't want him to drop my lunch one of these days. I don't mind standing in line for a second either.”

The top dog rolled his eyes before heading with Ashido back over to their usual table.

Midoriya couldn't help but stand there and fidget a bit, his eyes glued to the ground. Even if... what he said was true, it felt somewhat out of place.

Why was he really doing this?

He glanced up to the side at Kaminari, the taller boy already on his phone now.

_I guess it doesn't matter_. It was nice to have someone help carry the lunches for once... And he didn't have to stand in line a second time for his own.

It really only took a minute or two to get their lunches, the ones having gotten them setting the trays down by the others.

Kaminari had already sat down, beginning to eat when some bickering from a few tables down caught the green-haired's attention.

“- I said, what do you think you're even doing in a hero school anyways?”

Tetsutetsu was leaning over a victim, Kirishima right by his side and his sharp teeth bared in a snarl at the other; A guy with purple hair and eye-bags, seeming rather unamused by the encounter.

“I could be asking you the same question,” He retorted, leaning back against the table, looking almost relaxed.

Tetsutetsu _growled_ , turning his gaze towards Kirishima. “This villain is fuckin' annoying.”

His friend narrowed his eyes, sneering as his body visibly hardened. “Hey, we got our licenses to use against villains anyways. I'm sure we'd be allowed to use our quirks on him.”

The subject of the two jerks' boredom was the one to narrow his eyes this time, something which sent chills down Midoriya’s spine flashing over his face before it quickly faded: Replaced by a sigh as he tilted his head in annoyance.

“You could at least tell me why I'm a villain all of a sudden.”

“Really, you need me to _tell yo-”_

Tetsutetsu's body straightened, his eyes just going... blank.

Kirishima looked from his friend to the other person before he started to become _angry_ -

“Hey, give me my fucking best friend back-!” Kirishima swung at him, Midoriya's gaze catching the movement of the purple-haired's lips as Tetsutetsu suddenly darted in front of his fist, taking the brunt force of his power.

“Shit- Fuck! You coward-” The aggravated teen tried once again to hit the guy's jaw with his fist, the latter dodging as he lets his apparent puppet come between them.

“Now come on... Do you really think I'd stand a fair chance in a fist fight against a third year Hero Course student with a hardening quirk?” A sly smile found its way onto his face as he shook his head.

“You're just a hunk of rock. At least I have brain. Now, do you at least have a large enough walnut in your skull to realize using your quirk to beat up the new guy in the middle of lunch isn't a good idea? You might be able to get away with a lot of things in this school, but I don't know if that's really the best move on your part.”

Kirishima's eyes hesitantly wandered to see how everyone in the room and ceased conversation to stare at the commotion. Cursing under his breath, he takes a step back, Tetsutetsu being released from whatever control he was under and looking... scared. He looks back at the one who had moved his body against his own will; Who had that same, chilling look on his face as he had had earlier.

They both stalked off, not happy with whatever just happened.

Silence pursued for a few moments longer before slowly, conversations began to continue from wherever they had left off – or, new ones started – a handful of them most definitely being about the scene they had all just witnessed.

Midoriya's gaze continued to follow the mysterious person as he sat back down, picking at his food. He probably would have lost his appetite as well after an encounter such as that one; Although, it most likely would have partially been due to new bruises forming on his abdomen.

His eyes flickered from his own tray of his food which was getting cold back over to the other.

He... really wanted to talk to him.

Sitting down, he proceeded to wolf down his food as quickly as possible, Ashido giggling about how he was like a starved puppy even though she thought she had been feeding him enough. Whatever that meant.

He managed to finish the majority of his meal before the bell rang, scampering to put his tray back before catching up with the student who had caught his attention.

“H-hello!” Midoriya squeaked, his voice accidentally coming out too high-pitched, causing him to slap a hand over his mouth in embarrassment.

Yeah, moments like these are when he'd love to be able to hide in his hair a bit better.

The other eyed him cautiously, on his way to put his own tray in the drop-off area.

He realized he should maybe speak a bit more. Or not, as he might end up going off on a-

“I, u-um, I saw what you did- I mean, everyone did, but- I mean, it's not bad! I think it's really g-good you stood up to them, and I thought it was r-really cool how calm you seemed t-too, and the way you use Tetsutetsu as like a b-body guard so his own friend was punching him- Your quirk is like- Some sort of mind or body control, right? That's so cool- I'm not sure how it activates, maybe v-voice activated? A-ah, b-but it seems like such a useful quirk! You could do s-so many things with it, like use villains' allies a-against each other like you j-just did, or you could probably e-even help someone calm down if they were having a panic attack or s-something, or-”

_Shit!_ Midoriya slapped a hand over his mouth once again, his face growing hot.

_Izuku, seriously? Please, you have this one chance to talk to someone can you_ not _ruin it and scare them away for-_

A low chuckle came from the person he had accidentally went on a tangent to; It then became something lighter and airy.

Midoriya blinked. He hadn't even realized the other had already put his tray away as they came to a standstill outside the entrance to the cafeteria.

“You need to remember to breathe.”

The purple-haired student continued to walk again, glancing back to make sure the other was following. It took him a second, but he slowly sputtered back to life and caught up with the other.

“S-sorry... I- I got too excited, um-”

The person talking with him had paused for a moment, staring at him.

“... Don't apologize. I don't get why you're excited though.” He grumbled as he carried on, rubbing the back of his neck.

“O-oh! Well, you see- I um, really love learning about quirks... and I haven't really seen one like t-that. Not to mention, you shutting down those b-bullies was... really cool.” Midoriya found a slight grin growing on his face, looking to the side as he recounted the ordeal.

He hadn't caught the look the other gave him. It probably would have made his face heat up a bit more.

“Well... That's a first,” the taller counterpart huffed.

Midoriya peered back up at him. Upon seeing the faint color which dashed his cheeks and the odd, small smile which had formed there – making it look like he really wasn't used to smiling – he couldn't help but feel a tug at the corner of his own lips.

“What's your name?”

“Shinsou Hitoshi.”

Midoriya nodded to that, almost becoming lost in thought before Shinsou gave him a weird look. “... Dude, what's yours?”

“ _Oh-_ shit,” He muttered under his breath, squeezing his eyes shut as his cheeks grew warm once more and he tried to recover. “M-midoriya Izuku.”

Shinsou grinned, looking back ahead as they arrived at a classroom door. He stopped walking, sliding the door open as he leaned against the frame.

As per logical response, the boy with the thick, curly hair stopped in his own tracks, looking at Shinsou with noted confusion.

“... I guess you haven't noticed yet, but we're in the same class. You, uh- Actually sit in front of me.”

_Thanks, let me just go and die now-_

… Is what he thought, but instead he did his best to hide his red face as he entered the room, spluttering a small thanks.

Shinsou let out a sigh which was shortly followed by a smirk, going in after him.

At least class was going to be a bit better now, maybe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't really have an upload schedule for this- I just write whenever I feel inspired to and get too excited to show people it, so I publish it right away haha


	4. Protect Him

After that Wednesday came Thursday, then Friday...

The week had come to an end.

It went slower than usual.

Normally, that was a bad thing. That typically meant more people than usual were going out of their way to make his life miserable; Or, in the past month, given extra stuff to do by the big three. Even then, he couldn't help but feel it was better than the life he was living before.

Ah- But that's not the reason.

On Wednesday, Midoriya met Shinsou; And to his embarrassment, they were even in the same class, Shinsou sitting behind him.

Shinsou seemed amused by it though at least, instead of annoyed by the fact that Midoriya literally hadn't noticed him at all. Even while being around Ashido, he had failed to notice the gossip of the new student with a villainous quirk.

Midoriya definitely enjoyed class more now.

Before, it was mostly a good time to continue filling his notebooks, occasionally paying attention to wherever the class was up to at given points. It still was, but now he enjoyed talking to Shinsou every little bit; After class, walking with him to the cafeteria before he joined with Bakugou Squad.

It was Monday now. Midoriya went through the aforementioned steps, Kaminari having helped him once again with the lunch trays at least and sitting down with them. His eyes wandered in the direction of Shinsou a few times, the other catching his gaze once and giving him a lazy grin, causing the green-haired to smile.

Ashido look between the two before groaning.

"Stop drooling all over the table at the new kid, Deku. It's gross."

Cheeks growing warm, he fumbled on words for a second before just fidgeting with his chopsticks and looking down.

  
"I-I'm not-... _I'm not drooling..."_ He pouted.

She stared at him for a second before breaking out into laughter. Midoriya really didn't understand what was so funny, but Kaminari had to help her calm down. "Sorry-" _she snorts_ "- the face you're making is just so disgusting, I- Just go over to your boyfriend for today, _please-_ "

Continuing to laugh, he felt the back of his neck and the tips of his ears heat up as well before he took his lunch and hurried over to Shinsou, the other cocking an eyebrow at him.  
  


"To what do I owe your presence at lunch?"

  
"U-um, I was- Dismissed. Or, something like that..." He began to mumble as he poked at his rice.

Shinsou seemed to lose interest in his own food at the moment, resting his elbow on the table and letting his arm prop his head up.

"Why do you even put up with them? I guess you don't get pushed around by everyone else, but I can't imagine exclusively getting pushed around by those three to be better."

Midoriya paused before slowly setting down his chopsticks, his eyes trained to the bowl of grains.

".. I... Sometimes... I'm not sure if it's worth it or not... I ask myself that a lot, but- As long as I stay on their good side, it isn't bad... I was- I was so tired of how things were before. Being told I'm _worthless,_ that I'll never amount to _anything-_ The complete ignoration of my existence asides from physical reminders once in a while..."

He began to hesitate, squirming a little. "S-sorry, I haven't even known you l-long, I shouldn't j-just-"

"It's okay."

The green set of eyes snapped up to meet the purple pair, instantly putting him more at ease.

"I mean- My story is a bit different, but, I get the gist of it..." Shinsou rubbed the back of his neck and glanced to the side, something Midoriya noted as a natural reflex of his.

"Just because...!" He spoke up suddenly, causing the other to become momentarily startled.

The tension in Midoriya's body released as he looked back down once more.

"... just because we're different. Just because I was born without a quirk- because you were born with one people don't like..."

His words came out hushed; Almost a whisper, but Shinsou heard every word amidst all the other people in that room.

It clicked in his head.

... But instead of feeling bad for the other boy; Instead of feeling bad for himself, curling in on his own body and conscious to try and protect it from a cruel world-

He felt... something dark and toxic fester inside of him.

Something angry and bitter- Something which had always been there he knew, but it had been quiet- It was becoming louder.

Shinsou swallowed the feeling down for now.

He slowly reached a hand out, tapping the other's arm, causing the boy with curls to look up.

His eyes weren't just sad... They were void of any hope. He had been broken and beaten down by this world many times, not unlike him.

Shinsou didn't see any traces of that bitterness and anger he had in himself though.

_... I want to protect him._

".. Want to walk with me down the hill today?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's a shorter chapter, but i wanted to give them a bit more time to get along before any bigger events


	5. Brain Freeze

As the bell chimed signifying the end of the school day, Midoriya quickly packed away his things to get on with his clean-up duty.

Ever since Monday, he and Shinsou enjoy walking down the school's hill together until they part ways; The purple-haired needing to take a left, while the boy with curls had to go right.

That first day they walked down the hill, Midoriya had fumbled to try and fill the silence, finding different heroes to go on and on about before promptly apologizing for going on too long about them as he wasn't sure whether or not Shinsou wanted to hear any of it or not: But the taller boy always waved off his apologies, telling him there's no need for them and that he enjoys his rambling.

On Tuesday he still did his best to fill the silence, this time catching himself before he unnecessarily apologized for getting lost in his own thoughts out loud, Shinsou only speaking a few words, seeming rather contempt otherwise.

With Wednesday, Midoriya ended up needing to do a last-minute assignment for Bakugou as the other had completely forgotten about it. If it was a normal situation, in another life, Midoriya probably would have scolded him half-heartedly before they laughed it off and he helped him. Maybe in a different universe. In this one, his actions were fueled by fear, working quickly under stress as not to upset someone the same age as him – someone he knew his whole life – because they could make his life a living hell at moment's notice; As if he's just putty in his hands.

It took half an hour, and he was surprised to see Shinsou... standing by the gates, on his phone. As Midoriya had approached, his friend's gaze flickered up to meet his and the corner of his mouth twitched upright before he gave a small salute.

Warm.

Midoriya felt warmth spread through his chest at that moment, a feeling he didn't particularly recognize.

He had ended up staring at him for a few moments like a deer in headlights before snapping out of it and fidgeting. Even though he had wanted to ask why – why would you wait for me _~~someone like me?~~ _ – Shinsou turned around and began walking instead, leaving Midoriya to just catch up and walk with him.

They fell into a comfortable silence.

Never before had Midoriya felt so at ease in the quiet company of another.

Thursday was also relatively quiet, walking even closer together than before, their arms having brushed against each other once or twice; Although Shinsou did end up starting a bit of small talk which Midoriya enjoyed. He found out he really loved cats, the taller boy showing him a few pictures on his phone of strays he keeps tabs on.

That brought us to Friday.

They hadn't actually been lucky enough to be put on clean-up duty together, but the other person who was supposed to help with Midoriya left right away anyways, leaving Shinsou to stay and take their place. The green-haired try to get a word out, insisting that he didn't have to help him, but Shinsou just stated he had planned on waiting for him anyways.

A comfortable silence was set between them once more as they worked to clean the room up a bit- Shinsou actually grabbing his attention quick to show off some graffiti he found on a table, the words written being _"kiss my ass bakubitch"_. Midoriya promptly snorted at the letters, a grin finding its way on the face of the one who had found it as he gazed at the one he got to giggle in amusement.

It really didn't take long, and ten minutes later than usual they made their descent down the hill.

This time, their hands brushed once. A tingly feeling was promptly shot through his entire body with his hair standing on end as they did, Midoriya putting a hand to his chest to try and calm his heartbeat.

_God, really? This is my reaction to our hands just barely grazing each other??_

Taking a deep breath and trying to relax, he cautiously snuck a glance at the other, only for their eyes to meet.

Immediately, Midoriya could feel his cheeks heat up, looking straight down, not getting to see the little smirk of the other that grew on his face.

When they reached the bottom of the hill, they both ended up just kind of standing there. He didn't know why, but his heart ached; He didn't want to separate yet. He won't get to see the other until Monday, and- Oh god, he almost forgot. The big party was tonight, and he was being forced to go by the Bakusquad.

"Midoriya..-"

As his name was spoken he was broken out of his thoughts, looking up to meet purple eyes.

"Uh... If you want, we can get something at the convenience store together." Shinsou shot a thumb over his shoulder, pointing at the _7/11_ which stood at the foot of their school's hill.

Without any hesitation, he immediately nodded his head, happy for an excuse to stay in the presence of the other a bit longer.

Heading into the store, the cashier acknowledged both of them as Shinsou headed over to the slushie machine. It isn't that popular of a drink in Japan, but there are still a few _7/11_ s which do sell them.

Midoriya had just been planning on getting some _Pocky_ or something, but became intrigued by what the other was getting and followed him.

"Hey, you've ever had one before?"

"No... I've seen other students walking out of here with them before though."

Shinsou hummed in response, filling half of his cup with a flavor called _Blue Raspberry_.

"Is there any flavor you wanna try?"

He gazed at the other options curiously. "Cherry?"

Nodding mutely in response, he filled the remainder of the cup with the requested flavor. "I'm guessing you don't mind sharing a straw?"

Midoriya's heart rate picked up again for a second before he shook his head, beginning to think there's something seriously wrong with him for getting excited over such small gestures.

Shinsou paid for the slushie while the shorter boy ended up getting a strawberry flavored _Pocky_.

They went and sat down on the curb of the convenience store's concrete foundation, the sun shining down on them in a way that Midoriya welcomed, even getting him to close his eyes for a moment to appreciate that feeling.

The sound of a plastic straw rubbing against a plastic dome cover snapped him out of his brief sunbathing, looking back at the cup Shinsou was holding out for him to try.

He gingerly took it, his hands getting wet from the condensation which covered the exterior and cold from its contents.

Hesitantly taking a small sip, he was pleasantly surprised by the taste of the cold crushed ice with syrup which filled his mouth. _Blue Raspberry_ is an american flavor too, something he wouldn't be familiar with if his dad hadn't sent him a box with american sweets on a few occasions.

Moving the straw up so the end of it was in the cherry flavored portion of the frozen drink, he took a bigger, longer sip this time- Too big and too long. He let out a tiny hiss as the back of his head suddenly felt cold and pounded, torn between the thought of _ow_ and _cherry is even better._

"Oh, that's the best part." Shinsou chuckles, taking the drink back from him and taking a long sip himself. As the pain subsided for Midoriya, he furrowed his brows and stared at the other boy, a bit confused at what he meant as well as a bit upset that he hadn't warned him, the purple-haired wincing at his own brain freeze now.

"What do you mean?"

"Hm..." Shinsou kept his eyes trained on the drink he held in his hands. "The drink itself is great and all, but I appreciate the pain as well. I mean, I used to never wait for coffee to cool down and liked feeling it burn- It's nicer having the head pain I guess."

As he had finished talking, one of his hands left the drink to rub at the back of his neck, the cold wetness of it being somewhat pleasant as well.

Midoriya continued to stare at him, his face dropping a bit, trying to process what he said and how to respond to that. Eventually, he let his shoulders drop some of the tension they were holding and sat back a bit, looking down at his shoes as he scuffed them against the ground.

".. Why do you... want to feel pain?" He wasn't fully expecting an answer. The other really didn't have to answer. He just wanted to give him an opportunity to talk about it if he wanted to.

Shinsou sat back a bit as well, putting the drink down at his side and placing his hands on the ground to lean back further. "I don't know. Never felt the need to open a vein or anything, but feeling pain just makes me feel better. Or it makes me feel worse and I like that? I don't fully get it myself."

Midoriya scrunched his nose up slightly as he looked back at the other, the purple-haired boy gazing at the sky with a reflective look.

He didn't fully understand why someone would actively want to feel pain. Bakugou's burns were never fun to have; Neither were the other bruises, cuts and scrapes he's been covered with throughout his life. Maybe if his bullying wouldn't have been as physical, he would have ended up seeking the feeling out.

Shinsou's eyes flickered to meet Midoriya's gaze. They held eye contact before the taller boy frowned. "Hey... Nevermind. I don't like being the reason you have that look on your face."

_What look?_ He purses his lips before shaking his head and frowning himself. "N-no- I want to listen. I will listen."

They stared at each other for a little longer, unreadable emotions flashing with the silver and purple of Shinsou's eyes before he finally looked away, sitting back up and wiping his hands on his pants.

".. Maybe another time."

Midoriya could accept that answer for now. He was happy that his friend had at least opened up to him a little for the time being.

They continued to share the slushie, Midoriya opening his _Pocky_ as well and sharing it with Shinsou as they watched the sun sink further in the sky.

He loved this. Just sitting next to Shinsou. _I could easily grab his hand if I wanted to-_

He shoved more _Pocky_ in his own mouth.

Eventually, the slushie was empty, and the box of the treat they enjoyed only had three sticks left.

They got up, slowly walking out to the sidewalk where they seemed hesitant to leave each other's company once again.

".. Uh, the place I'm living at is actually just three blocks straight down the street on the right. The family name is Adachi- They're my current foster home."

Midoriya didn't dwell on the fact that he stays in a foster home. Instead, he smiled, feeling that warmth in his chest again, happy that Shinsou had given him that info even though he wasn't sure what he'd do with it yet.

"Okay... Thanks..! And I, um- I enjoyed hanging out with you after school- I hope we can do it again soon...-" For some reason, he couldn't help but begin to fidget as he spoke.

Then, Shinsou gave him one of the softest smiles he's ever seen.

His heart skipped a beat.

"Yeah. I'd like that."

With a small wave, they parted ways.

Midoriya clutched his heart.

As he walked back home, the image of Shinsou smiling down at him like that became something permanently ingrained in his heart.

_Ok._ He grinned, clenching his fists.

With a new fire lit inside of him, he was ready to take on whatever the night had in store for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry it took me a bit to get this outttt


	6. The Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the content rating is now mature !

Midoriya stood before the house.

The early May air was still a bit cool, offering some sort of strange comfort.

After he and Shinsou had parted ways, he had felt a new form of confidence fill him, giving him the strength to arrive here without chickening out or beginning to shake as nerves got the best of him.

_Ah... that couldn't last that long though, now could it?_

Midoriya tried wiping his sweaty palms on his pants: high waist ones which hugged his form in a way that made him self-conscious, as well as a patterned top Ashido had all picked out for him, saying she didn't trust whatever fashion choices he would make and didn't want to have to look at him the whole night then.

There were already a lot of people inside, with flashing lights emanating from the windows and the bass of the music being audible; Some people already on apparent smoke breaks outside or getting fresh air quick before ducking back into the party.

God... god, he was nervous now.

"Puppy~!"

Midoriya yelped as a weight was thrown onto his back, its limbs wrapping around his torso as he stumbled forward, barely catching them both.

"M-mina..." He whined, tilting his head slightly to look at her wide grin as she rested her chin on his shoulder.

"Hop hop, let's goo~!!" Ashido giggled, pumping her fist into the air and beginning to squirm around, almost causing them to both go under again.

"Jeez Mina, you sure you aren't already drunk?" Kaminari huffed, coming up beside them.

"Noooo~, but I may have taken something alreaaady..."

"Mina, Denki, _move it,"_ a low growl came from behind them as Kaminari and Midoriya stepped to the side, allowing Bakugou to lead the way towards the house.

The other two trudged behind him, the green-haired noting how Kaminari walked at his impaired pace due to carrying his friend until they arrived at the door.

Midoriya was met with the smell of smoke – cigarette smoke, as well as what he assumed was cannabis (he's caught a whiff of the smell near the school bleachers before) – with the smell of alcohol to slowly follow.

The house was already a bit warm judging by the breeze that hit him as the door had opened, but he could only assume as the night dragged on it would get warmer and warmer and things would start to smell sweaty and moist too, and _god_ just thinking about it already made him feel claustrophobic and gross-

He was dreading the night.

Taking in a shaky breath, he stepped inside, setting Ashido down as his eyes scanned the room.

Although he didn't personally recollect everyone's faces (which is understanding considering he isn't exactly the social type), they were familiar to him, bringing up the blurred memories of his two years at U.A. so far, signifying that the attendees of the party were all third year students like him.

It almost seemed like _every_ third year student was here, just about.

He could recognize the faces of people who kept to their own friend groups, people who often got pushed around; They weren't mingling with the people who had a more dominant social standing in the school, but they were all here regardless, seeming to just want to let loose.

"Oi, Deku, get us drinks," came the barked order from Bakugou, interrupting Midoriya from his thoughts as he headed off to grab what was requested.

As he went to where he assumed the kitchen was, he continued to let his gaze wander; Soaking in the information around him, even without any particular use for it. It'll all most likely end up being filed as a smear of pictures, sounds, and feelings under ' _Bad Night',_ but maybe it'll somehow end up being a valued experience, no matter how shitty..?

_Don't get your hopes up._

There were coolers in the kitchen full of different alcoholic beverages; He searched for a soda for himself, finding large liter bottles of _Coca Cola,_ but hesitated upon grabbing it.

_If I want to get through this night, I think I'm gonna have to try to get a little drunk..._

Midoriya grumbled, his nose scrunching up at the thought already, but sighing as he grabbed four beers. He really didn't know much about alcohol – only having tried his mom's wine once or twice with her supervision – so he hoped these would satisfy them for now.

As he came back, he found the squad on the couch, a number of people already interacting with them as they relaxed and talking, passing around some sort of oddly shaped glass tube which bubbled as they smoked for it.

This is... really outside his comfort zone, he realized.

Fidgeting, he stepped up in front of them, passing out the beers, feeling himself relax slightly at the soul fact Bakugou didn't stop mid-conversation to look at him and growl and spit _'What the fuck is this shit you're handing me?'._ They'll probably want something other than beer later, but for now, he was satisfied with that.

Midoriya was about to go and find a corner or something until they needed him next before Kaminari grabbed onto his sleeve and tugged him down so he was sitting next to them on the couch.

... What?

He dared to give Kaminari a questioning look, the other just smiling as he cracked his beer open and handed the shorter boy the bottle opener.

Gingerly taking it, he tried opening it, pressing his lips together as it slips on him the first time but getting it with the second attempt.

Bringing the drink to his nose, he doesn't know why he thought it would smell light _Sprite_ as the carbonation caused little bubbles to pop and have the drink to pepper his nose in a refreshing way.

Instead, he's met with something musky. The powerful smell of yeast as it attacks his nose in a not-so-cute way like the gentle peppering of the fizziness from soft drinks he loves.

Well. Down the hatch.

His eyes squeeze shut as he tilts his head back and lets it run down his throat for a few gulps. The consistency was creamy at least, but god did he not enjoy the taste. He's sure there's a lot of creamy things out there which he'd never want to swallow, so he can't really use that adjective to try and justify the drink either.

They sit on the couch for a while, Midoriya slowly making progress on his drink, trying to get used to the taste.

Curiously enough, whilst only half paying mind to the fact the other three were talking to all the other people there and to each other, Kaminari had to shake him a few times to let him know there were people actually talking to _him._

And it wasn't... mean?

It sounds sad and pathetic, but Midoriya can't remember the last time people really just talked to him like that. Like he was a person, and not a waste of space.

The beer didn't taste so bad anymore.

Midoriya even tried that glass tube they were passing around, finding out it was called a bong.

Eventually they went to the kitchen together to try other drinks instead of just a beer; The green haired teen was glad they were smart enough to know he couldn't really do much else for them in the alcohol department besides passing beers.

"Okay, so I have to... salt... lime, and then shot-"

"NoooOo~!! That's not right!! Here, give me the _Tequila_ -" Ashido snatched the bottle before pouring it into her own shot glass, licking where her thumb and pointer finger meet before applying salt and holding the lime in the same hand, the shot glass cradled in her grip.

She licked the patch as she downed the liquid, immediately followed by her sucking on the citrus before slamming her glass down. Midoriya stared at her in a mixture of awe and confusion at her quick succession of actions – _where did she learn these things?_

Hesitantly, he followed the same steps, almost choking with how the alcohol felt like it was burning his throat.

_Why? Why do people drink this stuff again?_

His face – and slowly his body – definitely felt warm now, as he unbuttoned a few of the first bottoms of his top so his chest could breath a bit better at least.

He'll slowly start to find out.

As the night continued, Midoriya kept trying new things out; He made it a point to avoid things like pills, he's not a complete idiot, but he tried seeing what a blunt was like and coughed a lot- Before trying again, and finding it was kind of nice.

He was giggling and laughing more, a smile constantly finding itself on his face, his cheeks hurting from doing it so much as he found himself falling into giggle fits more and more often, his face already pretty flushed from becoming drunk.

It feels nice. It feels really nice, actually. He can't remember the last time he felt so happy and relaxed. Well, he had to get Tetsutetsu off of Ashido earlier, distracting him by saying there were first years trying to get into the party, but it didn't phase him as he continued his night.

And people- They kept talking to him. He was constantly being talked to, and he didn't _mind_ , even though sometimes it was about pretty stupid things, though he's not sure how capable he'd be of holding an intelligent conversation.

"Hey, Midoriya... You're looking nice."

... What?

Wait, what?

_What what what what what what???_

"Huh?"

The person laughed, tilting the short teen's chin up.

"I said... you look hot."

Midoriya squinted his eyes at the person as he tried to focus on their face as he tried to process what they meant.

"... Oh."

He scrunched up his nose. "I feel hot."

The person chuckled, shaking his head. "I'm sure you do. I meant you look attractive though."

"... _Oh."_

_"_ Mhm."

He took a step back away from the other person, holding his head for a second before turning around and walking towards the door, mind feeling as if it was stuffed with cotton.

Right as he reached for the door, it opened- Revealing Uraraka in a cute little bubbly dress, looking absolutely nervous as she played with her hair, shifting side to side.

Midoriya's jaw dropped before he squished his own cheeks together, his eyes shining.

"Ohmygod- Oh my god, Ochako- Ohh my god, you look- hehehee, you look so cute oh my god-"

"I-Izuku?! Uaa, your face is so red, are you o-okay?"

He placed has hands heavily onto her shoulders, causing her to jump a little, the former wearing the biggest stupidest grin that's ever graced his face.

"I feel fuckin' great. But- that's not the point- You look sooo cute holy shit..."

Uraraka slowly relaxed before she startled giggling, snorting as it turned into laughter. Midoriya couldn't help but do the same, both of them just losing it in the doorway even though one was very drunk and the other was very sober.

Nerves probably had something to do with it though.

"Okay oka- hehehe, w-wait-" Uraraka places a hand on Midoriya's shoulder now to stabilize himself.

All of a sudden, she steeled her gaze, determination emanating from it.

"I am here on a mission."

Midoriya paused, staring at her for a second before tilting his head. "Wha...?"

Uraraka's cheeks began to flush as her eyes darted around.

"Y-you know..!"

His own gaze stayed fixed to hers for a few moments longer before his eyes widen in realization and a big dumb smile finds itself on his face once again.

"Let's gooo~!! I know where he is-"

Not caring for how sweaty his hands probably were, he grabbed his friend's, weaving through the people before his eyes settled on bright, spiky red hair.

He began to giggle, Uraraka looking at him in confusion.

"I-it- pfft, it looks like a maple leaf...keke-" Now he was cackling, holding his stomach. She couldn't help but grin as she looked from Kirishima's hair to her best friend, and then continued to stare down at him as she felt happiness bubble inside of her.

Naturally, Uraraka has never seen Midoriya in a state like _this_ ; They've had giggle fits before while sleeping over which felt like they had maybe taken something, but seeing him so giggly and smiley in an open space like this- It's really nice.

And Midoriya's comment was nice too. If she feels anxiety getting the best of her when she approaches Kirishima, she can just picture his hair as a big red maple leaf, and maybe it'll feel a little less intimidating.

Uraraka felt a new brush of confidence fill her as she leaves Midoriya to recover from giggling and approaches Kirishima.

He was talking to a lot of other people; It's his and Tetsutetsu's party after all. Somehow, she managed to catch him right at the moment where he was about to go get another drink.

"Kirishima!"

The teen stopped, looking over at who had called his name. Slowly, other people in the room began to cease the conversations to watch the exchange.

Uraraka froze up as he turned towards her, cocking his head.

She knows people are watching, she _knows_ and it's a lot of pressure- The words won't get past her tongue, and-

Her gaze fell onto the shape of his hair. The corner of her lips curled into a small smile as she shook her head.

"Thank you for inviting me to the party- Um... The letter you wrote me. It was really sweet."

Kirishima's eyes flashed with confusion for a second before he began to smirk.

"Oh?"

He approached her, coming to a stop in front of her as he leaned down and whispered into her ear: "Wanna talk about it in private?"

Uraraka processed the words for a moment, as well as the feeling of his breath on her ear before her face went red and she managed a nod.

Taking a step back again, he put his hands in his pockets.

"Meet me upstairs in the master bedroom in ten minutes."

Kirishima walked back over to his friends as everyone broke out into new conversations, leaving Uraraka standing there, stiff as a board.

Midoriya had watched. He had also realized, to his horror, that he had written a letter, pretending to be Kirishima; Something he completely forgot in his drunken stupor.

Something Uraraka doesn't know.

Something which means Kirishima is playing along to some stupid, sick game with her heart.

He felt his heartbeat pick up as he went over to where Uraraka was just standing.

She's gone.

Fuck-

_Fuck fuck fuck fuck-_

Spotting Kirishima now talking to his friend group, he went over to them.

"- oh my god, you don't even know what she's talking about?!"

"Do I need to? She was totally convinced with it herself, so this is a perfect opportunity I won't pass up on."

"What exactly are you planning on doing?"

"Well, you see... I'm gonna set up a screen for you guys and a little camera too. See how far she'll go for me. She looks cute, I don't mind letting her blow me. I bet all I have to say is 'Do it for me', and 'If you love me you'll do it'."

His blood began to fucking boil.

Before he had a chance to slit the guy's throat, he jumped up on the table, yelling to get everyone's attention.

"Excuse me! Everyone! We will be having a showing of _'Roundface Fits a Lot'_ in t minus ten minutes! Feel free to turn your attention to the TV- Get comfy, make some popcorn!"

That's it.

Midoriya climbs onto the table too, glaring at Kirishima.

"No, we won't."

".. What?"

"You're not going to film my best friend without fucking consent."

" _Deku,_ " Bakugou snapped, approaching them from the group of people he was with.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing."

The green-haired drunk teen narrowed his eyes at the person who approached him.

"I'm not standing for this shit. No one takes advantage of my fucking friend when I can do something to stop it."

"You useless _sack_ of _shit;_ _get down from there_. Let people have fun."

Midoriya jumped down, staring Bakugou dead in the eyes.

"Ruining people's lives is not having fun, _Kacchan."_ He practically spits his name out.

"Izuku?"

He averts his gaze to look at Uraraka, who stood at the edge of the room; seeming to have just come from upstairs.

"I-Is everyone okay..? It got quiet all of a sudden, a-and-"

"No. It isn't okay, you should leave."

"... Eh?"

"How about you tell her, Deku- since you're so keen on ruining fucking everything- Tell her who actually wrote the letter."

"... I-Izuku? W-what does he mean-"

Midoriya could feel bile rising in the back of his throat, looking down at Bakugou's feet. He felt sick. Sick from the alcohol, sick from what he did, sick from the actions of the people around him, sick from life-

At least he didn't get to feel sick from watching his best friend's face crumble as she began to cry and fled the party.

Next thing he knew, Bakugou's shoes were painted with vomit, and he was being held by his collar, the other hissing in his ear.

"After everything I fucking did for you, _this_ is what I get in return? You're going to fucking regret ever being born. I'll make fucking sure of it, you're going to regret _every_ _decision_ you've ever made in your life leading up to this moment, and I'll personally fucking _make sure_ the only escape for you is _death._ "

Dropped back on the ground, Bakugou walked away.

He wasn't sure what the state of everyone else was. If they were still watching, what they were feeling- All he could hear is ringing in his ears as his eyes, unfocused and blurry, stared down at his hands.

Midoriya went to the sink and washed his mouth out, splashing cold water on his face before just leaving. There was no point in staying any longer.

He just walked.

His feet carrying him somewhere. He wasn't sure where, and he didn't care wherever it ended up being, as long as it wasn't back at that party.

...

Ah.

He's going to die, isn't he?

Bakugou might not literally murder him, but he won't be able to live a proper life after this.

This goes beyond school. Bakugou is going to be a high ranking Pro Hero, he knows that- So...

There's no escape.

He might as well have died back there at that party.

On Monday, things are already going to start.

He's never been the strongest mentally speaking- Middle School already almost pushed him over the edge.

Literally.

What is he going to do?

He really doesn't want to die yet. He's not sure if that's a survival instinct, or a genuine wish.

He knows his mom would miss him-

...

_Would Shinsou miss me?_

Midoriya blinked his eyes back into focus, looking around. He hadn't noticed he was at the bottom of U.A.'s hill now, in front of the convenience store.

Staring at the curb where he and Shinsou had sat together just earlier today; It felt like ages ago.

_".. Uh, the place I'm living at is actually just three blocks straight down the street on the right. The family name is Adachi- They're my current foster home."_

Midoriya's feet began to move on their own once more.

He knew what he wanted to do.


	7. Beautiful

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning : this chapter contains nsfw ( underage consensual sex )  
> if you do n o t want to read that, when ___ appears to separate that part to the rest, skip and read the end notes of the chapter !  
> once you've read that, go back and find the second line to mark when the scene is over  
> (reading the end notes also works as a summary of what happened for the rest of the night)

Shinsou's eyes were trained to the ceiling, the typically white paint appearing a lot more yellow with his desk lamp on.

The bumpy texture of the paint mixed with the still rather darkness of the room lead to an effect not unlike white noise for his sight, the texture in the frame of his vision looking like it was moving, contorting into different obscure shapes and patterns, like energy; never able to stay put for a moment.

He blinked.

Ah. It wasn't moving as much now.

He took that as a moment to let his gaze slide to his phone, reaching out his hand to press the power button.

_ 2:36AM. _

_ Great. _

Shinsou groaned as he put an arm over his eyes.

When he couldn't see, his mind was not far from the state of the ceiling when he looked at it.

For such an unenergetic person, his thoughts never seemed to want to  _ shut up. _

Those thoughts varied.

The typical whispers of words he's heard uttered around him his whole life:

_ That's a villain's quirk. _

_ You can't be a hero with a quirk like that. _

_ That quirk can only hurt people. _

**_You even look like a villain._ **

_... _

“ _..- S-sorry... I- I got too excited, um-” _

  
  
  
  


.. That voice has also been consuming his thoughts more and more often.

_ "..- A-ah, b-but it seems like such a useful quirk! " _

_ "..- Shinsou! Let's have lunch!" _

_ "..- N-no- I want to listen. I will listen." _

_ "..- Hm? Shinsou, what's wrong..?" _

Shinsou's heart dropped as he heard a sound from outside his window.

_ The garbage bin? Maybe some raccoons got into it? _

He sat up, hearing a  _ thump  _ on the little overhang outside his window protecting a small patio below; Narrowing his eyes, feeling as his heart rate began to pick up.

A dark shape moved outside, not being able to see anything other than  _ movement  _ due to his desk lamp positioned next to the window before suddenly-

The window opened.

Shinsou was ready to attack whoever was about to come in- He swears. At least, however ready you can be lying in bed with nothing but boxers on and your brain feeling like mush.

He didn't have to though.

Emerald eyes met amethyst ones.

"M-midoriya..? What the fuck..?"

"Shhhh- Izuku, just call me Izuku dammit."

Shinsou stared at him, his mouth gaped open as his mind tried to process.

It became even harder to process as Midoriya took off his shoes and climbed onto his bed-

As he climbed  _ on top _ of him.

"Mido- uh, Izuku- Wait, what-"

Midoriya narrowed his eyes as his nose scrunched up a little  _ (which was really fucking cute by the way), _ giving him a second to spit it out.

That's when he could smell it- The scent of alcohol from his mouth.

His clothes smelled like a party as well; Not that he's really been to one before, but it was a whole host of different smells, the most notable one probably being cannabis.

What all those observations ended up doing though was having his eyes trace the shorter teen's body-  _ The teen that was on top of him, while he was only wearing boxers. _

Midoriya's green eyes practically glowed in the low light, his gaze half-lidded but fixed on the boy underneath him.

His skin looked  _ warm,  _ his cheeks and his chest flushed a pretty shade of red, and god the top he was wearing had a good number of buttons already undone and was now falling off his shoulder slightly as well, revealing that his shoulders were also indeed red,  _ and covered in freckles- _

Fuck.

Fuck, he was screwed.

"Izuku- Y-you're obviously very drunk. I don't want you to do anything you'd regret- I couldn't live with myself knowing I took advantage of you."

That earned him a huff from the smaller teen, shifting a bit on top of him, causing Shinsou to have to grit his teeth.

"I'm probably not as drunk as you think."

"You're still drunk- I would want to know what sober Izuku thinks first before we..-"

"Hitoshi."

A shiver ran down his spine with the way Midoriya whispered his name.

Midoriya pressed his forehead against Shinsou's, his eyes becoming clearer.

"I think you're beautiful. I think you're the most beautiful thing to ever come from this fucked up world. I've never been more sure of anything in my life."

.. With eyes like those piercing into his soul, he couldn't not believe the other truly meant those words.

Then, their lips clashed; Almost like two tidal waves meeting each other.

**___**

Shinsou took a fistful of Midoriya's hair to stabilize himself, the latter whining into the kiss, grinding his ass down onto the crotch underneath him.

The purple-haired teen groaned at the friction, wanting so badly to just grip on to the smaller's hips and thrust up, but he let his hand go slack in the dark locks instead, trailing it down the back of the other's neck,  _ feeling  _ how he shivered under the touch and relished in the breathy moan he let out, bringing his hand to the front to try and undo the last of the buttons on his top but finding it to be difficult with one hand; His other still supporting his torso and keeping him up right.

Midoriya brought his own hands up to the front of his top and did it himself, sliding it off and throwing it on the floor before – when what would be under any normal circumstance – an embarrassing noise slipped from his throat as Shinsou's hands felt up his bare sides: But really, he has no room in his life for embarrassment right now.

These are his last days alive, and fuck if he isn't going to enjoy them.

As Shinsou admired his chest, sides and waist, Midoriya wasted no time to start getting his pants off, finding the button and zipper of them but having a hard time wriggling out of the tight material.

Shinsou saw the opportunity and took it; Pushing the shorter teen down onto the bed before kissing him once again, Midoriya completely forgetting for a second that he was even trying to get out of his skinny jeans as their tongues collided hungrily.

The taller teen bit the other's bottom lip softly, earning another soft whine before he trailed down his body, peppering kisses onto the soft, hot, freckled skin.

Midoriya just  _ melted  _ under his gentle touch, not bothering to even try and hold back all of the little noises that rose from the back of his throat, some coming out rather high-pitched and needy sounding.

Shinsou grinned into his lower abdomen before slowly beginning to tug his pants down- His boxers and bulge soon free from constraint.

He took the material the rest of the way off to get it over with before coming back between Midoriya's legs and palming his crotch, the reaction immediate as he bucked his hips at the contact and whimpered  _ "H-hitoshi..." _

_ Shit. _

Shinsou wanted so badly to just take his time with Midoriya – his first time, and his first time with the other, and he was sure it was also the smaller teen's first time – but god, the way he reacted to everything, the way his name sounded on the other's tongue in this setting...

Shinsou yanked Midoriya's briefs down, earning him a squeak before his long fingers curled around his dick- And shit, it already felt slick and  _ wet _ .

Midoriya squirmed and whined under the touch, bucking his hips up again as he got stroked. He loved it- God he loved it so much but it isn't enough-  _ It's not enough yet- _ So he sat up, breathing a bit heavily already and pulled Shinsou by the back of his head into another kiss, letting out another high-pitched whine as he twisted his wrist in a certain way.

A string of saliva connected their mouths this time as they pulled away and Shinsou swore he could feel Midoriya pulse in his hand before he was pushed back down on the bed like when he had first arrived.

The curly-haired teen took his boxers off the rest of the way before his fingers dug into the waistband of Shinsou's, pulling down and watching as the other's dick popped out as the fabric was removed.

Midoriya licked his lips as he looked at it but made sure to take off the last article of clothing between them all the way so it wouldn't be a problem in the future.

Then they clung to each other, as if their lives depended on it.

Skin on skin, their mouths moving against each other, Midoriya's hand finding its way into Shinsou's hair while the latter's hand ends up on the other's ass, giving it a squeeze and eliciting a high-pitched moan from him.

Midoriya pulled away, licking his lips of some of the saliva.

"I can't wait anymore- I  _ need  _ it."

Who is Shinsou to deny him after saying it like  _ that? _

He bit his lip as he reached out a hand and took some of the lubricant from Midoriya's dick and applied it to his own. He didn't have a condom- There might be vaseline in the house, but they're doing this  _ now. _

Midoriya positioned his ass above his dick, Shinsou holding his tip to try and guide it to the entrance properly.

He felt it begin to push in and the taller teen already had to stifle a sound from escaping him- Meanwhile, he could hear the other's breath hitch as he began to try and lower himself.

Once a bit of it was in he slowly moved his hand away, letting both of his hands find their way to Midoriya's hips, squeezing them.

Midoriya did his best to relax as he felt Shinsou fill him- God, it's an intoxicating feeling.

He bit back a whine as he pushed down the last of the way, the purple-haired teen releasing a sharp exhale, not having realized he was holding his breath while watching the shorter teen lower himself onto him.

Midoriya slowly began to lift himself before falling back down on his dick again, letting out a tiny gasp, Shinsou gritting his teeth as his thumbs gripped into his hips further.

Beginning to try and find a rhythm, he kept lifting his ass up before coming back down onto him a few times, eventually rolling his hips with the last one, causing Shinsou to  _ moan. _

Midoriya did it a second time, feeling his entire body shudder as he whined.

With the third time, Shinsou couldn't control himself anymore as he pulled the shorter teen down onto him and thrust up simultaneously, Shinsou hissing under his breath as Midoriya gasped loudly.

Panting and letting out more little noises, he leaned forward and placed his hands on Shinsou's chest, finding leverage to roll his hips more, the other releasing his own moans as he grinded up into him at the same time, using his grip on Midoriya to help.

_ "N-ngh... H-hitoshi...~" _

_ "F-fuck, Izu...-" _

They were both breathing heavily now, moving together, as if their bodies were  _ made _ to fit the other's.

_ "Hitoshi... H-hitoshi, I love you- Mm..!" _

_ "I-izuku, I- rgh, I love you too..!" _

Shinsou came first, Midoriya tightening around him before he came himself, letting himself cling to him, wrapping his arms around his torso and digging his face into his bare chest.

**___**

They were both hot to the touch, was well as wet from sweat- Both continuing to pant as they recovered from the high.

Shinsou slowly brought a hand up which he carded through Midoriya's damp, dark green locks.

Eventually he tilted his head so the side of it was pressed against the other's chest instead of his face being dug into it.

He listened to his heartbeat. It was one of the most comforting sounds he's ever heard.

"... Izuku..?"

The boy in question hummed in response.

".. Do-... Do you really... love me..?"

Midoriya didn't respond for a second, listening as Shinsou's heart rate picked up.

He turned his head to look at him, resting his chin on his chest, his own green eyes relaxed, searching through the mixture of emotions in Shinsou's lilac ones.

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Wha- Why  _ would  _ you?"

A huff. "You're kind- You're understanding. You understood  _ me-  _ Finding someone to trust in this world is so hard, yet in less than two weeks I've never wanted to trust someone with my heart more."

Midoriya watched as Shinsou's eyebrows furrowed, looking as if he wanted to protest.

"You're... far kinder than I'll ever be. You only say I'm kind because I was  _ eventually  _ nice to you. I'm not very understanding, I hold grudges and I hold them hard. I only make all these exceptions for you because you- You were the first person not to be scared of me for my quirk, or for the way I  _ look-" _

"Who the hell told you you're anything but beautiful?" Midoriya's eyes narrowed, pursing his lips.

"Everyone. Literally everyone, Izuku- You are the first person to ever give me a genuine compliment since before my quirk manifested."

"Idiots..." He grumbled, looking down at Shinsou's collarbone.

The purple-haired teen sighed before the corners of his lips curled into a small smile.

"I don't agree with you that I'm beautiful, but you sure as hell."

His eyes snapped up to meet the other's again with that, this time being the one to look like he wanted to protest.

"Well I don't know about  _ that-" _

"Hypocrite." Shinsou huffed with a grin.

"Hey! I know I'm right. I'll  _ prove  _ it. I'll prove that you're the most beautiful thing in this world."

"How so?"

"You're not getting any sleep tonight." Midoriya pulled himself off of his torso, their skin sticking together momentarily, straddling him once again.

"Izuku... All that does is prove to me that you're drop-dead gorgeous."

"Then let's make this beautiful together." The curly-haired teen was the one to grin this time, biting his lower lip.

Shinsou's heart leapt in his chest before he let out a shaky exhale, leaning over and grabbing a bottle of  _ Mountain Dew  _ he happened to have on his nightstand and taking a swig.

"Alright. Let's fuckin' go."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They clung to each other, as if their lives depended on it. They moved together, fitting every part of the other, as if they were 100% wholly made to be with the other person. It wasn't just having sex, it was becoming a part of each other on a different level, becoming as close to each other as humanly possible, their souls desperately latching on to one another-
> 
> And it was everything they needed.


	8. Fair Game

Birds sang into the late morning as light beamed in through the window, hitting the feet of two teens entangled in one another.

Shinsou was the first one to blearily blink his eyes open, his nose embedded in the curls of the smaller boy who had his arms wrapped around his torso. He took a deep breath of his scent before exhaling, bringing one of his hands up from where it rested on the other's lower shoulder blade and running a hand through the forest green locks.

Midoriya didn't react much in his sleep, simply curling into the taller teen's form more, Shinsou taking the hand he had in the other's hair and slowly trailing his fingers down his spine, feeling the smooth skin, pausing when it brushed over something...  _ different. _

Shinsou shifted his weight back slightly, pulling Midoriya with him so he could get a better look at his freckled back, not having seen all the details in the low light of the previous night.

Starburst burn scars spaced out on his skin, the patches appearing slightly more reflective, all ranging in size but there nonetheless. The purple-haired teen's hand slowly trailed the permanently affected skin, feeling the slight elevations of it before letting out a shaky breath.

He felt sick.

His Izuku was  _ hurt. _

Who knows exactly how many times? These are just the ones that left real marks and healed.

How many bruises?

How many cuts?

How many sprains?

How many words were spat at him that forever affected him, telling him he was worthless?

Convincing him he'll never be anything.

"Hi-.. toshi..?"

Shinsou blinked, looking down at Midoriya who was sleepily nuzzled into him, those green eyes still trying to find focus as they met the other's. That's when he realized he had been gripping the smaller a bit too hard, letting his body relax more.

"Morning, Izuku..." He mumbled, managing a small smile, it turning more genuine as Midoriya smiled softly back at him.

Midoriya felt groggy. And sore. He felt really sore. Actually, his whole body felt like lead. He doesn't think he'll be able to stand any time soon if he tried. His boyfriend's –  _ they have to be boyfriends now, right?  _ – shifting and tightened grip on him had just barely been enough to convince him to try and reclaim his consciousness, though he may still be willing to give it up again.

"N'you good?" He slurred, realizing how that his head was kind of pounding, figuring it was the alcohol's after effects, squeezing his eyes shut.

A low chuckle rumbled from Shinsou's chest, Midoriya reeling in the vibrations as he pressed the side of his head against it.

"I'm... How are you?"

Midoriya pursed his lips. If he were to respond without thinking, he'd just say tired and sore. With the night he shared with Shinsou though... Yeah, that was great. He's feeling pretty good about that.  _ Wait, oh god. We didn't even refer to each other by our first names before that- Then I just came in here and- Wait, we said we love each other- Oh my god wait he loves me. Someone- Hitoshi loves me- Wait... Wait, last night- _

He felt his heart drop.

He completely forgot about what happened with Bakugou.

"Izuku...?" Shinsou pulled him a bit closer, having watched all the different emotions that flashed through his eyes.

"I... I fucked up."

Well, those were not words Shinsou wanted to hear. His own heart dropped at that and Midoriya immediately realized he should follow up with that quickly.

"No I- I mean, fuck... I think I'm gonna die. I- last night, at the party- I went against Katsuki... I- He was gonna let Ochako get hurt, so I told him I was  _ done  _ and I wouldn't let him do that, and- He told me he was going to make sure my life was miserable. That no matter w-what I did, I'll- I'll never be able to live a normal life a-and h-he'll make sure that  _ t-the o-only esca-ape is d-d-dea-ath- _ "

"Shhh, Izuku..." Shinsou began to softly rub comforting circles on the other's back as Midoriya broke down into sobs, pushing his face into Shinsou's chest further.

"I-I d-d-don't w-wanna die n-now tha-at s-someo-one loves m-me..."

In this very moment, all Shinsou could do was hold him and try to comfort him.

Inside, he was seething.

He felt this  _ itch. _

He could  _ feel  _ Midoriya's pain. He could feel it as if it was his own, and it hurts. It hurts even more because it's Midoriya's pain.

But... Shinsou feels something else too.

That itch.

It's coming from that dark thing inside him he had choked back not long ago; Suppressed so he could just spend time with Midoriya.

Maybe he should have scratched that itch sooner. His Izuku wouldn't be crying in his arms right now, legitimately scared for his own  _ life. _

"You're not gonna die."

Shinsou moved his hand from Midoriya's back up into his curls, threading his fingers through the dark green locks.

"I'm not gonna let anyone hurt you ever again. You and me, we're gonna be strong. Because we're together. I  _ promise  _ you won't ever have to suffer again..."

And he meant those words.

It doesn't matter what he has to do.

No one is going to get a chance to hurt his Izuku.

__________

"Come on, his parents are at work right now."

Midoriya opened the front door with a spare key located under the carpet, thankful that its placement hasn't changed since he was a kid.

"Remind me never to get a job where I have to work Saturday mornings..." Shinsou grumbled, his hands in his pockets as he came in behind him.

"It's one thirty now." Midoriya rolled his eyes, wincing as he made the wrong movement and muttered under his breath, heading over to the kitchen.

The purple-haired teen narrowed his eyes as he followed. "Be careful, I wasn't joking when I said I'd carry you if you want, you know."

"That's embarrassing though..." He huffed, cheeks dusted pink as he looked into the cupboards for a mug.

"Okay, so- Being carried because you're sore is embarrassing but  _ climbing through my room in the middle of the night, straddling me and- _ "

"SHHH!!" Midoriya made a loud whining sound, his face going red.

Shinsou couldn't help the grin that grew on his face, cocking an eyebrow at him.

"You're the one who did it."

" _ I was drunk and thought my life was about to end... _ "

"You don't regret it though."

".. I'm very glad I did it but  _ that's besides the point _ \- ANYWAYS!"

Shinsou rolled his eyes, watching as Midoriya gathered random items from the fridge and shelf which didn't fit together at all. "What's the plan?"

Midoriya paused before a small grin found its way onto his own face.

"Hangover cure for Katsuki. Of course it's just made up of the grossest things I could find, but he doesn't have to know that..."

His grin fell into a ghost of a smile.

".. And then some groveling and begging for him to spare my life."

Shinsou hated that look. The darkness that began to cloud this emerald eyes when the other thought about apologizing to his tormentor and going back to his old life.

He wanted that look gone for good.

"You know... I might have a good ingredient for that drink."

Midoriya looked at him curiously as he opened the doors under the sink and pulled out some drain cleaner, grabbing a mug and pouring some in before sliding it over.

"Presto! He won't know what hit him."

The green-haired boy tried to process what he was suggesting before hesitantly laughing.

"U-uh, I don't want to  _ kill  _ him, Hitoshi."

"He seems to want to kill you, I think it's fair game."

They stared into each other's eyes for a moment, trying to read each other: A silent conversation.

Midoriya didn't like what he read in his boyfriend's gaze.

It... scared him.

He averted his eye contact. "U-uh, I know! How about we cough up some phlegm balls for his drink."

Shinsou shrugged, placing a cover on his mug of drain cleaner and trying to summon something from the back of his throat.

Midoriya did the same, not managing anything but spitting in the mug anyways, mixing other ingredients in: Milk, pickle juice, mayonnaise, barbecue sauce, vanilla extract, eggs...

The curly-haired teen took a step back from his creation, looking prideful as he placed his hands on his hips.

"She's beautiful- You've really outdone yourself, Izuku." Shinsou spat into the drink too before putting the cover on it. Midoriya giggled, going and wrapping his arms around the taller's neck.

Gaze softening, Shinsou rested his arms around his lower waist and pulled him closer into a deep kiss.

The calm before the storm.

Midoriya reached one of his arms out over to the side, grabbing one of the mugs and pulling away from Shinsou.

"Come on, I want to get this over with."

Shinsou glanced from the mug in Midoriya's hand over to the counter as the other turned around. "Izuku-"

"Hm?" He looked back, his head tilted curiously and his eyes filled with light.

A light he knew was about to be dampened and shit over by that person upstairs.

A light which will forever be threatened by that  _ person  _ who dares to exist just to torment someone so sweet and kind.

Shinsou grit his teeth, letting that darkness in him expand.

"Nevermind."

They went upstairs, Midoriya taking a shaky breath as he came to a stop in front of Bakugou's door.

It's been a long time since he last stood in front of this door.

He knocked, a little too softly- Shinsou knocked a lot louder for him, earning a groan from the other side in response.

They exchanged a look before Midoriya pushed the door open, his gaze wandering around the room. It's definitely changed a bit: As expected when the last time he was here was when it was the room of a four year old.

Bakugou had his arm over his eyes, tilting his head slightly and peaking a squinted eye out at the people who entered.

Red.

His eyes have always been so red.

When they were little, when they were friends; When Bakugou started pushing him and telling him to his face he's useless. When he started using him as a dummy to test his quirk on. When he'd take his things and destroy them and just stare at him,  _ red  _ saying everything they needed to.  _ When he told him to just jump off a roof- _

He felt Shinsou's hand on his shoulder, the grip tightening. It grounded him a little.

"The fuck are you doing here... I gave you until Monday, I thought I was bein' generous for your useless ass... You want to fuckin' go now?"

"U-um..! I- I-I came to apologize. F-for my actions, a-and- throwing up on you, u-um, and I- I made you this? A hangover c-cure?"

Shinsou snorted slightly at the detail that Midoriya vomited on Bakugou, wishing he could have seen that.

Bakugou didn't find it as funny.

He sat up, hissing as he held his head.

"Then you better start fucking  _ begging. _ I won't even question why the mind fucker is here, I think it takes a single fucking braincell to see you two fucked."

Midoriya gaped for a second, unsure what to do, his body feeling stiff.

"Well? Get down on your knees, bitch."

The grip Shinsou's hand had on his shoulder hurt.

Shakily, he lowered himself onto his knees, tilting his head down and holding out the drink.

"I-I'm sorry- F-for being dumb, a-and useless, w-worthless, a w-waste of space-"

Bakugou huffed, narrowing his eyes as he took the drink.

"That's a fuckin' start. Keep listing things, go on. I know all of it, but you don't fuckin' apologize for it enough."

It hurt. His chest constricted around his heart and lungs so tightly, it was hard to breath, hard to choke out the words, doing his best to find those things Bakugou wanted to hear, that he himself believed half of the time.

Then he heard a choking sound that didn't come from his own mouth.

He looked up, watching as the mug fell, blue liquid spilling onto the ground as Bakugou clawed at his throat, more gurgling and choking sounds coming from the blonde.

They made eye contact as he said his last words.

" _ D- Deku..- _ "

The life faded from those red eyes which had been the subject of his living and sleeping nightmares the majority of his existence.

Bakugou's body fell limply to the ground.

Everything stopped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)
> 
> sorry it took me a bit to write this


	9. Suicide Note

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> big panic attack coming and mild descriptions of corpse be careful yeah

He stared.

Midoriya's eyes stayed fixed to the unmoving corpse of his childhood best friend; His life long tormentor.

Foam, blood, and blue liquid leaked out of his gaped mouth.

His eyes were open too.

Red eyes which were always the subject of his dreams now lifeless.

He could hear his own heart beating slowly as he  _ just stared. _

...

As quickly as everything had stopped, it all came crashing down on him at once.

Midoriya's heart pounded relentlessly in his own head as he let out a choked noise, hunching over and resisting the urge to vomit from the dread and panic that filled his entire being.

"H-Hey, Izuku..." A soothing hand rubbed circles on his back as Shinsou crouched beside him.

"W-We killed him,  _ w-we fucking k-killed him- We k-k-kille-ed a p-perso-on- _ "

Midoriya was gasping for breath as the otherwise silence of the room felt like it was suffocating him, his chest heaving as tears pricked at the corner of his eyes and began to overflow: Sobbing, pushing air in and out of his lungs at a rapid pace, wanting nothing more than to just not need to exist in that moment.

It didn't feel real.

How could this be real?

This...  _ How could he have killed someone? _

"Izuku- Izuku I need you to  _ slow down your breathing-  _ Take deeper breaths,  _ please- _ "

All Midoriya could do was shake his head as he squeezed his eyes shut tighter, coughing as he made strangled sounds to breathe.

Shinsou mumbled a small  _ shit  _ before wrapping his arms around Midoriya and pulling him close to himself, having him rest the side of his head against his chest.

Midoriya's sobbing got a bit harder, but his breathing wasn't  _ as  _ bad which is only saying so much.

Shinsou held him.

He squeezed him as close as he could as he whispered reassurances, telling him he's okay, it's going to be okay, that he loves him, that he's here and they're together; Running a hand through his hair, pressing his forehead against his curls.

Gradually, Midoriya began to calm down, reduced to ragged breaths and hiccups, his entire body feeling unbelievably heavy.

Shinsou... wasn't sure if he regretted it.

Seeing Midoriya like that scared him. It  _ hurt  _ him. His heart was aching unbearably so in his chest having just witnessed such an awful panic attack from the person he cares about most, yet...

Bakugou is gone now.

He won't ever have the opportunity to give his Izuku more scars, more trauma, more fear ever again.

He decided it was worth it.

Shinsou lifted his head and looked down at the boy curled in his arms as he shifted slightly, his body relaxing just a bit.

"W... W-What are we g-gonna do..?" Midoriya mumbled, his gaze fixed on nothing in particular but in the direction of the floor.

The taller teen paused for a moment as he thought before beginning to thread his fingers through his hair again.

".. Well... First of all, we're going to stick together. I'm- I'm not gonna let anything happen to you. We'll be okay."

Midoriya tilted his head to push half of it into the other's chest more.

".. Second of all... You... You know Bakugou's handwriting well... right?"

".. Y-Yeah... I-I can do it alright..."

"And- You know his personality well too, right? We could... We could write a suicide note."

The green-haired teen tensed again for a moment before looking up at the one holding him.

"A... A-A suicide note? I don't- He would n-never-"

"It's the only thing I can think of... And you never know what's really going on inside of someone's head. Just- Take what you know, if you were to humanize him- What's something that could have weighed down on him?"

Looking contemplative, Midoriya slowly lost the tension in his body as he looked down, sitting up a bit more.

Shinsou looked around, taking a moment to untangle himself from the other before going over to Bakugou's desk, taking a paper and a pen; Grabbing a book Midoriya could use to write on as well.

He sat back down next to him, handing the other teen the materials in the process, noting how he was still shaky.

"U-Um... I thought about it... And- What if we wrote about- The pressure of needing to be the best? H-How- If you don't take control of o-others, they'll take control of you- Being t-told you're the best from a young age t-thanks to your quirk, and needing to live up t-to those expectations, and causing p-pain to others because- Because that's how t-the world said things had to be. So- S-So he didn't want to... to l-live in that kind of world anymore..."

"Tch... I wish he actually thought that way. That's good though- That's believable."

" _ Believable... _ " Midoriya whispered, clutching the pen he held. The pressure in his chest was unbearable. He just... He felt numb and so pumped full of emotions at the same time. He wanted to cry, to curl into a ball and not have to deal with any of it all now.

A murderer doesn't get such luxury.

So, he began to write.

Shinsou watched, smoothing his hand across Midoriya's back and pressing down a bit harder whenever his writing hand began to shake too much.

At one point, Shinsou had to push the book and paper away as Midoriya began to sob again, pulling him into his chest once more.

"A-Aunt M-Mitsuki, U-Uncle Matsur-ro-"

"Shh, I know, I know..." He placed a kiss against his forehead.

It took him a few minutes to calm down enough to continue, but after that, Midoriya managed to finish the suicide note without interruptions.

They read through it together, holding hands.

"I think this is good- I'd believe it."

"B-But don't you think t-they'll still investigate for the p-possibility of foul play?"

"I think if the suicide note is this well written and speaks this much truth, probably not..."

"But- It's still s-so unexpected of Katsuki to do s-something like this..."

"This won't be the police's first time dealing with a suicide no one had predicted- We can try to wipe our fingerprints from everything we've touched just to be sure though."

Midoriya opened his mouth to speak again but gave in, looking down as he bit his lip.

Ever since Bakugou first collapsed, he's refused to let his gaze wander in that direction: Refused to acknowledge the fact that he's in the same room as a dead body thanks to him.

Closing his eyes, he drew in a deep breath before exhaling, steeling himself just enough so he can get out of here. He met Shinsou's gaze and nodded.

They both stood up, Midoriya trying to wipe off any potential finger prints on the note. He wasn't sure how well it'd work since paper is a bit absorbent, but at least he hadn't gotten any ink or graphite on his fingers and left a mark on the note.

Shinsou took the note and approached the body, his boyfriend immediately turning to look away, getting the finger prints off of the book and pen in the meantime.

The purple-haired teen took the hand of the dead teen that was slowly losing warmth and put the other's fingerprints all over it before placing it on his nightstand.

"H-Hitoshi..-"

He turned to look back at Midoriya who still refused to look in that direction himself.

"Can you... C-Can you close his eyes? I don't want... I don't want Auntie and U-Uncle to have to see that..."

".. Yeah."

Shinsou pushed the dead teen's eyelids closed before standing up.

He didn't like this awful dark feeling inside of him. He was a bit shaken up too, but mostly just through the pain of seeing Midoriya react so strongly.

He wanted to feel more empathy for the person he killed.

He couldn't.

Shinsou narrowed his eyes at the person who had abused someone he cared about more than anything before turning around, coming up next to Midoriya and gently placing a hand on his back, causing him to flinch slightly before relaxing under the touch.

They looked at each other once more before leaving the room and closing the door, Shinsou wiping the handle down with his shirt.

Before they could leave the house altogether they cleaned up the drink Midoriya had meant to give Bakugou.

Midoriya wondered if... If Shinsou  _ knew  _ and didn't tell him.

He didn't want to think he was capable of that.

He didn't know what he'd do if he was.

So they left.

Locking the door and placing the key under the mat, Shinsou wiped the fingerprints off the handle once more before they took each other's hands, interlocking their fingers.

And as Midoriya began to shake and cry once more, Shinsou pulled him closer and wrapped an arm around him instead.

So they walked.

Shinsou guided the smaller teen as the other's eyes stayed screwed shut.

"I love you, Izuku. No one can hurt you anymore."

The last words didn't give any comfort as the taller had probably hoped.

".. I love you too."


	10. I'm Here

Midoriya had texted his mom, telling her he'd be at a friend's place when he went back to where Shinsou was staying: Not wanting to be alone.

Not wanting to be away from Shinsou.

He also didn't want to hear the sirens as he didn't live far from Bakugou.

Where Bakugou had lived.

So he stayed curled into the larger form of Shinsou on his bed, sometimes leaving his eyes cracked open to stare at the fabric of his shirt, or glance at something in the room; Other times, he just let them drift shut, occasionally squeezing them closed and trying to bring himself even closer to the other.

That night, they did hear sirens go by. There was no actual way of telling who they were for, but Midoriya just _knew_ , and he felt his whole body grew cold as he began to shake again, his breathing becoming more labored.

Shinsou squeezed him as tightly as he could, pressing a kiss to his forehead and sinking down so they were flat on their sides and they held each other.

He was so close to beginning to regret what he did. Not that it would help anything to regret it, it's not like he could bring Bakugou back; But at least it would make him feel more human to regret. At least Midoriya wouldn't be in so much pain.

He let his grip on the shorter teen loosen slightly to let his hand wander down his back, being able to _feel_ some of the scars through the fabric.

But he couldn't regret it.

_That fucker is gone._

Midoriya gradually calmed down, noticing how Shinsou was now carding his fingers through his hair and leaned into the touch.

A couple hours later, he got a call from his mother about what happened.

That Bakugou had committed suicide.

He didn't know how to respond.

He almost said _"No he didn't."_

It honestly wouldn't have been bad if he did; It just would've come across as denial.

Midoriya Inko asked if she should pick him up from his friend's place.

Shinsou had his arms wrapped around him – comforting him, grounding him – being a constant reminder that he isn't alone in this.

Midoriya shook his head even though she couldn't see, uttering a _"I wanna stay here."_

His mother understood and accepted that answer; As long as he was okay.

He wasn't okay, but he was way better off with Shinsou than at home.

At one point Shinsou pulled away from Midoriya and sat up, the latter looking at him confused, grabbing the hem of his shirt to keep him from leaving.

"Shh, I'm just going to get us some food, yeah?" Shinsou took his hand which had grabbed hold of his shirt, pressing a small kiss to it.

Midoriya looked hesitant but let him pull away fully, having let their finger contact linger momentarily before he curled back into a ball in the bed.

Heading downstairs, Shinsou heated up some pasta sauce his foster parents had made and boiled some noodles. His foster parents were often working or doing their own thing and never really bothered him which he was honestly grateful for; They made food he can heat up whenever for himself as well.

Putting the food in two bowls for them as well as grabbing two pairs of chopsticks, he paused at a cupboard and looked inside, finding a box of plain chocolate _Pocky._

He smiled to himself a bit as he took it. _Maybe Izuku would like it._

Shinsou came back to his room to find Midoriya tracing the sheets of his bed with his finger, feeling his heart clench at how cute yet beautiful he looked simultaneously.

It's strange how little time it can take to completely fall in love with a person.

"Come on, you're probably hungry too even if you can't feel it."

Midoriya really couldn't feel it.

The thought of eating almost made him feel sick in fact, but he knew he should.

Willing himself to sit up, he took one of the bowls from Shinsou and a pair of chopsticks, taking a single one of the thick, stubby curly noodles and pushing it into his mouth, leaving it there for a few seconds before he even started to chew.

Shinsou settled next to him, Midoriya immediately moving so he could be pressed against his side while he ate.

He began to eat himself, albeit at a normal pace compared to Midoriya, thinking.

"Mm... You wanna watch something?"

The curly-haired teen tilted his head to look at him, a part of him in the back of his mind saying _"How can I just casually eat and watch a movie or a show when I just fucking killed someone and passed it off as a suicide and everyone believes it his family doesn't_ know _the truth, they deserve to know the truth-"_

"Hey, Izuku-" Shinsou nudged him gently, his eyebrows furrowing in concern. "You zoned out there for a second."

Midoriya blinked before looking back down at his pasta, pushing around the noodles with his chopsticks and shrugging.

Shinsou bit his lip, his heart aching with how despondent he seems before reaching over and pulling his laptop up from the floor beside his bed.

Thankful for the _Netflix_ subscription his foster parents let him have an account on, he looked through the different options, brightening slightly as he came upon some _Studio Ghibli_ movies.

"What about _Kiki's Delivery Service_? That was one of my favorites when I was little- I always wanted a Jiji myself."

Shinsou blinked as he noticed... Midoriya was crying.

Shit.

"S-Shit, sorry- Uh, we don't have to watch that- Hey-"

Midoriya shook his head, sniffling as he wiped at his tears, shoving another noodle in his mouth.

"N-No, I j-just- I remembered O-Ochaco... we w-were gonna watch that together, i-it's one of h-her favorites too... a-and I remembered- I c-completely fucked over our r-relationship... fuck..."

The purple-haired teen placed his bowl down so he could wrap an arm around Midoriya, smoothing a thumb over his shoulder.

"Shh... You're alright. You'll get to talk with her again."

"B-But I _hurt_ her..."

"And you regret it. She might not forgive you, but she'll accept your apology. You guys are really close, right? I don't think she'd let anything come between you two that easily."

Midoriya's eyes darkened as his expression became more pained. "... I did..."

_I guess problems aren't as easily solved as killing the source of them._

Shinsou pressed his forehead against the upper side of Izuku's head, nosing his temple.

"I can't tell you everything you want to hear- I don't know how to solve it all, no matter how badly I want to be able to do that right now. But I can promise you that whatever happens you don't have to go through it alone. I'm forever here for you now, you got that?"

The words the other spoke near his ear were warm and low on their own, the meaning of them sinking in as well and warming him from his core as well.

Midoriya felt himself relax a little.

He allowed himself to.

_Hitoshi... is with me. He's always going to be with me. I'm never going to be_ alone.

Wiping at his face one last time, a soft, small smile found its way onto his face.

".. Okay."

Shinsou smiled himself and began to press a multitude of kisses against the side of his head, on his cheek, behind his ear, trailing down his neck- Midoriya began to giggle, squirming somewhat under the soft little love pecks.

He grinned into the crook of his neck, considering whether or not he should tease him a little as well but decided to just keep the moment as pure as it was.

Pulling back, he tucked a curl behind the other's ear, just _melting_ as those big eyes looked up at him.

"So... Are you alright with watching _Kiki's Delivery Service_? Or should we watch a different movie?"

"Mhm! We could binge _Studio Ghibli_ movies- Afterwards can we watch _Whisper of the Heart_ ? And _Spirited Away_ \- Oh we could watch _The Cat Returns_ too- And _Howl's Moving Castle_ -"

Shinsou chuckled sweetly, watching the life in his eyes dance as he started to get excited about watching the pre-quirk era animations.

"We can stay up as late as you can and watch as much as you want."

Midoriya's smile grew wider before he began to eat some more, pressing into Shinsou's side further.

His eyes followed the other's larger hand as it moved to put on the movie, admiring the way the tendons moved as his fingers flexed.

" _Pretty..._ " He mumbled.

Shinsou glanced at him, quirking an eyebrow as the movie began to play as he settled back a little, bringing his knees up so he could place his bowl there and wrap an arm around Midoriya once more.

A certain warmth proceeded to just wash over the smaller teen, spilling out of his mouth.

"I love you, Hitoshi."

The reciprocant of those words couldn't help but feel that warmth wash over himself as well. He wanted nothing more than to just live in that feeling forever.

"I love you too, Izuku."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ur welcome
> 
> ALSO  
> [WE GOT MEMES FOR THE LAST CHAPTER](https://imgur.com/a/UKlEMUh)

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading, I hope you've enjoyed and continue to do so !
> 
> Feel free to check out any of my art accounts (in order of what I'm most likely to upload to) :  
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/momokolove_) , [Instagram](https://www.instagram.com/momokoloveofficial/) , [Tumblr](https://momokoloveofficial.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Feel free to message me on Discord to chat ! momoko モモコラブ#1099  
> I'm always looking forward to vibing with new people, especially those who share love for Hitoshi and Izuku as well !


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